waiting

8.

I got home in a good mood. When my mom walked in my mom started complaining about how I was never home and she never sees me because of my friends. But it was really her she's never home. My dad isn't either, they are always at work or at meeting or something. She likes to lecture me about everything I'm doing wrong, it's like she doesn't even know that I'm having problems or I haven't had a real dinner the last 3 days. (Not including last night.) So I inturupted her mid-sentence, " have you notice that I've been down in the dumps or that I skipped school Friday, no because guess what you're not the one home. I have been depressed for weeks because I lot my bestfriend because of your stupid advice!" And that was that. I ran upstair not crying because I hate my mother so much! She makes me want to burn the house down but I know if I did that I would be homeless. I decide to take a shower. I walked across the hallway into the bathroom stomping my feet so my stupid mother could here me. As I stepped into the water my thoughts went down the drain with the grim on my body. Everything going down the drain. I sat there letting all the hot water run out, until it got to cold and I was back to reality. I grabbed my towel and went back to my room. When I left the house Saturday I left the thoughts of Jack here too. And now they are all coming back my mind wandering farther and farther into a fantasy of us being happy together, laughing and smiling. Not giving a dam about anybody but each other. Then I heard a Big Bang from the kitchen. Great mom is making dinner. No she's trying to make dinner. I wasn't in the mood for hockey pucks so I laid down and fell asleep.
"Why can't you love me! Is it because I'm not her! Because I don't dress the same because I don't smell the same uh? You broke it off with her for us! And now you're going back like a dog that ran away, they always go back."
" What makes you think I still love her! I love you and only you. Nothing can change that."
"Cut the crap. I know what kinda games you play. I know who you are. You're a lying, dirty scumbag."
"That's how you think of me uh? That's why you poured your heart out to me. I was always there to pick you up when you fell down. And you're treating me like this."
"Don't start crying please. No."
"I made a mistake, I'm sorry."
Beep! Beep! Beep!
Now I'm awake terrified. I have to get ready for school, oh the place I love the most. I run to my closet and throw on some jeans, a t-shirt, my vans, and a sweatshirt I got from Oregon. I brushed my hair and threw it up in a pony. Dabbed some foundation on and mascara. Then I found my way to the bathroom to pee and brush my teeth. As I sat down I could tell something was wrong. Yep, yay for me I started my period again. Yet another week of hell. I brushed my teeth and was out the door with a new time record for Monday. I ran to the store for some tampons and fruity gum (it relaxes me.) and drove to school from there. I parked in front of the school and took a deep breathe before I got out of the car. I was barely inside when Lexie ran up to me. She was wearing a face I couldn't understand until I saw it.