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imagine for: Instagram- helenrosex
Helen's POV
( outfit- a black and red flannel, leggings, and black nike shoes. // see it on @emilys.wattpad on Instagram! )
I can't do it anymore, it's all too much. All the rude comments from everyone, all the voices I hear inside of my head are just overcoming me anymore. I don't have any happiness. Actually, I take that back. I have one source of happiness in my life, and that's Hayes. He's the only reason why I've stayed say long, but this is it.
He will understand. This'll make me happier, because I won't be dealing with all of the pain. It'll all be over with. But I have to write a letter to him.
I went to my desk with tears rushing down my face, each one of them hitting the paper. After crumbling up numerous papers because of them being so wet, I've finally finished it.
Dear Hayes;
Hayes, Hayes. My Hayes. My baby. My sunshine. My happiness. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you more than anything, you are my light. You've kept me going, through it all... But, I just can't do this anymore. It has all gotten too me, I can't even breathe sometimes at night because it feels like there's weights on my chest. Every word is a knife stabbing into me. I've held on for as much as I could, and for you. You. You. You. Hayes, please understand that I love you and this is not because of you, you know that. It's just so hard anymore. I love you, and I always will. I will watch from up above you, and I'll always be with you. For the last time, I love you.
Love,
Helen.
This is it. I got in the car and drove to his house. My plan is to put the note in his bedroom, and then go home. He's supposed to be at a meeting, so I should be good for now. I have a key to get in, so I don't have to worry about it. I went through the front door quietly and I began to cry again. This is the last time I'll ever see this place. I went up to his bedroom and put my fingers on his door knob and turned it.
When I opened it, he was starring in the mirror, getting ready. Shit, he's supposed to be gone. When he first looked at me he smiled, then his face turned into an expression I've never seen before. He ran over to me and wrapped his arms around me, holding me so tightly too him. He pulled apart and put both hands on each side of my face.
"Helen what's wrong? What's this letter?" He said, looking down at my fingers.
He took it from me and I tried to grab it, but he started to read it. I was going to make a run for it, but he hurried up and quickly got in front of the door. When he looked back at me, his eyes were red and he began to cry, wrapping his arms around me once again.
"Helen, oh my goodness," he said, begging to sob.
"You were going to commit suicide?" He asked, and I just nodded.
"Let's get out of here. We can take everything and move. I have money. I don't want to be in this area when it's doing this much harm to you. Fuck the world, screw everything baby, it's just you and me. I cannot loose you Helen, don't you know that? Do you know how much you mean to me? Or what I would do without you?"
"I ju-just thought it was the only way I'd ever be happy again," I said, covering my face with my hands.
"No, no baby we'll get out of this town, we'll leave and you'll have to deal with no one around here. It'll be better for you. For the both of us," he said, and hours of hours talking, we decided to make a run for it.
He got inside my car and tensed up when he saw a gun and pills in the back seat.
He took my hand and kissed it so softly, and then my lips.
"I love you Helen, I love you so much," he said, looking me in the eyes.
"I love you," I whispered.
; 2 years later ;
It's been two years now and ever since that day, I've been clean. The first month and a half was really hard, but then it started to get easier and it felt like the right choice and decision. We moved out to London, our dream place. We have a little apartment and we are both working. He works with a photography studio, and I work at a local coffee shop. I've met two friends, Marley and Chelsea, and they are very sweet. They are co-workers of mine.
"Hayes, I'm home!" I shouted, walking through our apartment.
He was laying on the couch, all wrapped up in a blanket with some carton playing, such a nerd. I laid beside him and started to run my fingers through his hairs when his eyes fluttered open.
"Hi Helen, I love you."
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- hope you enjoy, love you!! xx
; love
Emily♥
