Happy Endings

Number Six

I wanted to die.

Most people joke around with stuff like that, saying they'd rather be dead then go to math class or something like that, and nobody takes you seriously.

That's what's bad.

"I want to die." Is such a serious, meaningful phrase, that we've made into a joke over the years.

I admit, I do it, but I try not to.

Until now, when I woke up, body bruised and swollen, eyes dull and empty, my body numb.

It was the after affect of The Hysterical. I knew that, been through it many times before. But this time, it was hard sulking around when the first thing I meet when I get to school, is my 'friend'.

"Alicia!" I kept my head down, my hair curtaining around my face as I walked past him, taking long strides.

"Hey, wait, Alicia!" His voice became concerned, and maybe even fearful as I heard him come after me, and I walked even faster through the crowd, trying to get lost in it.

No such luck.

"Alicia, come back!"

My blood boiled at his voice, and I clenched my straps tightly, nails digging in my palm.

Can't he know when I don't want to talk to him?

Can't he make any other friends?

The crowd thinned, and I broke through, taking a sharp left down an abandoned hall that led to the left wing, which was also abandoned, full of closets, storage rooms, and reeking of sex.

"Alicia!"

I whirled around, seeing his flushed face, his arm barely touching me.

"What is wrong with you?" I snapped, stopping him in his tracks.

He stared a long moment, eyes blown wide in confusion.

"What?"

"I said, what is wrong with you?" I repeated, my fingers itching, heart racing.

"I don't-"

"Why do you always hang around me? You're not a pet dog. Why don't you hang out with someone else who's not a bitch? Why don't you go and find a group of friends even and live your life with out me?" I swallowed the vile raising in my throat, and hurt flashed in his features.

"I don't-"

"Why do you care about me, huh? Why can you not care? Why don't you leave me alone like everybody else? I don't need you, and you need to leave. Go. Find someone else to be friends with." Guilt nagged at me, and everything inside me was screaming at me to take it all back, say I didn't mean it.

"Alicia..." He breathed, hurt plain as day across his face. "If this is about yesterday-"

"It's not! None of this has to do with yesterday. It's just you." I seethed. "Your always around. Your always so nice, and caring, and worrying about me all the time. Why can't you be like everybody else and not care? Why can't you be normal and find someone who you actually would enjoy hanging out with? Do you pity me? Is that it? Well I don't need it, and I don't need this so called friendship bullshit either." I crushed every shred of salvation i could've had.