Something Different

Bothersome Beauty

June 23, 2014

Past
2 years
Rosienna

I should just kill myself, yeah I should. Why won't I? No one cares about me. No one, even my mother doesn't. I should just jump of this bridge. Yeah, I should.

No one would notice, no one. Why would they when I am a failure.

I felt something warm on my cheeks, it was flowing to my chin until they dropped at my arm. Warm droplets, it felt nice. Soothing the chill. I touched my face and realized that the water where coming out of my eyes.

I wonder why?

I was crying, why though?

Maybe because your miserable. Yeah I am.

As a child I was always troubled, before I was always bullied at middle school because I was poor. Then one day I just snapped, I started hitting the boy who insulted me. Scratching his face over and over again until I saw blood in my nails. Until the teachers were pulling me apart from him.

I was a monster.

I was not deserving to be loved. I should just jump of this bridge and everyone I knew would be happy. They would be happy that I'm gone. As I was about to jump, when a voice from behind surprised me.

I quickly faced the direction where the voice came from. There stood a handsome boy probably at my age. His eyes widened when he saw my face, was I really that ugly? The thought only came another great hit to my deppresed state.

And when I knew it I was already falling to the river.

March 7, 2013

Past
3 yearѕ
Kaien

"Jewel" I said sleepily. It was late and the fact that she was in my arms 'bout to sleep, made a smile form its way up to my cheeks. She was just really my treasure, my Jewel.
"Mmmh?" She murmured tiredly, today was a busy day. I should let her sleep but I just really needed to say it. It was already on the tip of my toungue. I was itching to say it, and I should. Maybe she feels the same way, i'm sure she feels the same way.

"Jewel, I love you." I said huskily my voice filled with passion. There I finally said it, I said what was on my mind for about months now.

I wonder what her reaction would be?

I knew I would soon find out.

And I wish I hadn't, I felt her whole body tense like she was placed in a position she didn't want.

"I'm sorry, Kai."

I wish I hadn't said it, I wish I should have just slept.

Because what she said broke my heart, shattering it into tiny little pieces. It hurts, I don't want to feel this pain again.

Present
Rosienna

"Sienna, did you hear the fucking news!!" Amara, my best friend screamed at me. Something that I was already long used to. "What happened, Am?" I asked, I was actually curious.