I'm Just Septic-Eyed

Chapter 21: Bittersweet

A/N: Jeez. 2K? You guys are amazing.

Mark stared at his plate with concern and guilt. At the moment, Mark was with Mr. Ash in the man's apartment. He didn't tell Sean he was going out -- he couldn't bring himself to -- not after what happened. Mark had tried to apologize, but found himself stopped at the door. The most heartbreaking sound was coming from the other side of it: Sean crying. His heart felt heavy and he instantly wished to take everything back. But he couldn't -- the damage was done. Sean was alone right now all because Mark was an arrogant dick.

"You okay there, Mark?"

Sean's crying faded out of Mark's mind. He looked up to see the wrong face. "I'm fine," Mark's answer came out in a distracted tone. He put his fork to his plate and played with his food rather than eating it; he wasn't hungry anyway.

A frown tugged at Mr. Ash's lips. "You sure? Something seems off." His accent was all wrong. That wasn't the one Mark wanted to hear.

"I'm fine, really," Mark sighed in exasperation. "I'm just worried. I might've messed up big time." He ran a hand through his hair. He couldn't stop thinking about Sean. Maybe he shouldn't be here, maybe he should be with Sean instead. Why was he here? Nothing was right. "I think I should go back and apologize." Mark stood up, but Mr. Ash leaned over the table and grabbed his arm.

"Wait." Mark glanced at the hand grasping him tightly, then up to Mr. Ash's pleading face. "It can't be that important, can it? Can't you at least wait until after dinner?"

Mark's skin crawled. Something about that innocent sentence seemed quite the opposite. He broke his arm away from Mr. Ash. "I can't." He tried to walk toward the door as fast as he could without seeming suspicious. Mark stood at the doorway; he turned his head and said, "Goodbye, Mr. Ash." Then left without another word. He began running the three blocks back to his apartment.

~~~

Mark breathlessly burst through the front door. His legs were weak, and he could hardly breath, but he ran to Sean's room. He barged in saying, "Jack, I'm so --" But he cut himself off. Sean wasn't there. Mark spun around and searched the apartment. Chica wasn't anywhere to be seen, either. "Jack?" Mark called out as if Sean was somehow hiding. Mark began to panic. He pulled out his phone to call Sean, but received no answer. Mark launched himself toward the door and left the apartment. There was only one place he could think of where Sean could be.

Mark's feet bounded up the stairs to the second floor. He practically ran into the door of the apartment he needed. He pounded his fist on the door until Cry opened it to peek out. Cry widened it just enough for Mark to see his pissed off face. "Is... Jack here?" Mark managed to get out his question between gulps of air.

Cry signed something with his good hand that Mark didn't recognize, which could only mean it was a swear. Mark stood there with shaking legs and fuzzy vision as he waited for Cry to finish typing. "Leave, Mark. Sean doesn't want to see you. I don't even want to see you."

"Cry, please," Mark had to grip the doorway to stand up straight. "I-I just..."

"What? Are you going to insult me, too?"

Mark felt a pang of guilt stab his chest. "I-I didn't mean... I just -- I just..." There was someone whispering to Cry. Cry nodded. He shot one last dirty look to Mark then moved out of the doorway. To Mark's disappointment, it was Felix. Felix closed the door behind him. Mark had to lean against the rail to keep standing.

Felix took in a calming breath and turned to Mark. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Felix's voice exploded with anger. Mark stepped back into the railing. "Why would you do a stupid thing like that? Sean was fucking crying over you, you know that, right? You broke his heart, and then you go out on a fucking date? Is this some kind of game to you?" Felix was in Mark's face at this point. He was absolutely livid; something Mark never knew was possible.

Mark refused to have his legs give out. "I wanted to apologize --" Felix didn't let him finish.

"Oh, you wanted to." Felix rolled his eyes. "Then why didn't you? Sean is fully convinced you want nothing to do with him. You're still his friend, aren't you? Do you even want to be that, at least? Because I was fully convinced that you wanted to be more."

Mark's knees buckled beneath him; he let himself drop to the floor. He stared at the cement, blinking tears away. "Are you okay, Mark?" Felix's voice came out more calm than it was previously. Mark looked up to see concern on his friend's face. This made the tears escape Mark's eyes. The fact that Felix was able to be so kind, even after Mark was a total prick to their friend, made him feel so much guilt.

"I ran nonstop from Mr. Ash's apartment to here. I can't feel my legs anymore and I think I might pass out."

Felix sighed. He helped Mark up and practically carried him through the front door. Cry and Sean were in the living room. Sean was curled up on one end of the couch. Cry's eyes widened when he saw Mark with Felix. Felix held up a finger to stop Cry from questioning anything. He set Mark down on the opposite side of the couch than Sean and left to go get a water. Mark smiled weakly at Cry. Cry looked rather indifferent to the situation. Mark turned his head to see Sean, and then wished he hadn't.

Sean looked like a complete mess. His nose was pink and his eyes were puffy -- like he had been crying for a very long time. As if he could tell Mark was there, he pressed himself against the couch to get farther away. Mark shook away his blurry vision and took the water bottle Felix handed him. Cry and Felix looked at each other. It was as if they were having a silent conversation. Felix and Cry then turned their attention to the two broken souls in front of them. "We're gonna have you two work this out."

"Alone."

A/N: I feel like if I end it next chapter, I'll be leaving it with a bunch of loose ends. What do you guys think? I kinda don't want it to end. But all good things must come to an end, sadly. But let me know if it should end next chapter or not. Also what you think about this chapter. Thanks ;)