Love at its shortest time

On the Road

I was too apt to believe that I could gather my thoughts after hearing a series of his bromance experiences. It was the longest time I ever stayed in a comfort room for a pee break and the longest time I had ever hold my breath. My lungs were like shrinking as if it was torn and suffocated by the gases inside a holocaust chamber. I had nearly forgotten how to breathe.

I just wanted to stay there for a while. Thinking, if I needed to amend or discard such broken hopes; it would have appeased such conflict argument between my heart and mind. But, no. This was just the beginning, the commencement of absolute idiocray in love.

Before I wished to imprison myself and thrived in avoiding a glimpse of him, I went out and calmly stayed firm.

Me: Yeah, I am the great pretender (declaring my artistry of sealing such pain)

When I opened the door back to the room, he was there waiting, drawing such innocent face of contentment. If only I could ask his consent to cease the excitement of reminiscing his past, I would rather face a cobra knowing it would kill me instantly not like this: it kills me softly. He continued to converse about this and that of his love affairs. And I just turned deaf. Gladly, Dr. Jez's asked us to go downstairs and have breakfast.

I wished I could appeal to go home immediately for he was beyond ceasing his sharing. Talkative and insensitive. That's what I thought. But, why. Why did I wish for those smile to last? Why did I permit his pursuit of happiness? It might cost me great but why was I allowing it?

Love.

Hope not.

Fortunately, Dr. Jez's daughter arrived. She volunteered to drive us back to the city. What a nice person. It lightened up my mood somehow. When we were about to ride in the car, another staff jokingly uttered that we must sit together since we had become closer after our long streak of conversation that dawn. I was so confused if that would make me happy or sad. Well, I just smiled as what I always do, rain or shine.

Suddenly the radio played Meghan Trainor and John Legend's song Like I am Gonna Lose You, I prompted him to take note of the song. He tried to memorize the melody. While he was memorizing it, I was feeling his presence and wanting to sing that song for him; for the lines, I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you were just more than enough, to sum up, that moment of revelation.