Once When You Were Mine

Chapter Four

                                                        "For we are always what our situations hand us,

                                                                        it's either sadness or euphoria..."

                                                                                            - Billy Joel

Around 6:45 PM on Friday, the phone rang.

"What should I wear?" It was Austin and he sounded desperate.

"Huh?" I hadn't anticipated-wardrobe related questions.

"Should I wear a button-down or a knit shirt?" He sounded impatient.

"Nervous about your big date? Um," I thought for a minute, "Go for knit."

"The navy one?"

"How about the red and white striped one?"

"That one makes me look like 'Where's Waldo'," he grumbled.

"Then wear the navy one."

Austin was definitely on edge.

"Look, you'll be fine," I tried to reassure him.

"Uh-huh." He sounded unconvinced. "Look, I'll call you as soon as I get back."

The phone rang again at 10:00 PM.

"Are you back already?"

"Well, we just went to a movie," he said doubtfully. "Was I supposed to be gone longer?"

"I don't know. How did it go?"

"Not sure."

"Well, did you hold hands during the movie?"

"No," he said slowly, "I couldn't tell if she wanted me to or not."

"Where were her hands?"

"Huh?"

"Where were her hands?" I repeated the question. "You can tell whether a girl wants you to hold her hand or not by where she puts it." I explained, "If her arms are crossed, or if they were clasped in her lap, that means she doesn't want to. If she puts it on the arm rest or on her leg, but close to your hand, she does."

"Are you serious?" Austin asked.

"Sure," I said. "Well, I can't speak for other girls, but that's what I usually do. I went to a movie with Josh, my old biology lab partner, but I wasn't really sure if he was considering it a date or not. I really only liked him as a friend, and I didn't want to give him the wrong idea, so I was careful to keep my hands where he couldn't easily reach them. But when I went out to see that last 'Nightmare on Elm Street' movie with Rob, I kept my hand on my lap, but right next to where he had his. That way, I could make it accidental if our hands bumped together, and it would give him an opportunity to take it if he wanted."

"Why didn't you just take his hand?" he asked.

I thought about the demure girls mentioned in my mother's etiquette book and hoped I hadn't accidentally emulated their behavior. "I don't really know," I admitted honestly. "I guess it's easier just to drop body language hints, than to risk rejection."

"Ha!" Austin said, "Now you know how I feel."

"This conversation reminds me of this old book of dating etiquette from the 1960's that my Mom dug up. Listen to this." I read him the part about always letting the boy make the first move.