Facing the sick truth (3DG/MDD) *On Hold*

Chapter-17

Oh my god I'm so sorry I haven't updated in like a million years! Ugh I just couldn't get off my ass and write so a big thank you to Alex (@Alexlovesadam) for forcing me to get off my butt and write. And ew! I just attempted to watch blood diamond! Ew!! The beginning Is HORRIBLE!

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"J- Jason" I stuttered. I blinked over and over again trying to get it through my head.

"I thought- I thought you loved me" he stuttered

"Baby, I do!" I exclaimed waking over to him and linking our fingers. I stared into his beautiful blue eyes as they got teary.

"No, baby please don't cry"

"Ally! what the hell are you doing?! I thought you loved ME?!" Matt yelled.

"I- I do...UGH! I don't know anymore! I don't know what the fuck life stands for!" I cried planting my face in my hands.

Jason wrapped his arms around me as Matt stood there, staring at me in disbelief. I had two amazingly sexy men that loved me, and that I loved back, yet I was stuck between them and expected to choose one. god I'm such a fuck up!!!

I stood there for what felt like hours until an unbelievable thing happened. Jason kissed me like he had never kissed me before. for a split second in life I felt like he was happy. But the moment didn't last long before Matt was pulling Jason away, then out of the blue, he punched him square in the face.

"MATT WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?" I screamed at the absolute top if my lungs.

"IM TRYING TO PROTECT YOU ALISON!!!" he screamed back

"WHAT! AND YOU THINK PUNCHING MY BOYFRIEND IS TRYING TO PROTECT ME?! YOU CUT MY FUCKING WRISTS WHEN I WAS SLEEPING MATT! I thought you had changed" I whimpered the last bit

Barry then jumped in and pulled Matt away as years slowly slipped down his face, although he had an unbelievable amount of anger in his eyes.

Me brad and Adam then walked over to Jason and helped him up.

"Oh my! baby are you okay?!" I screeched.

"FUCK OFF!" he yelled. I instantly felt tears prick at my eyes

"Why are you mad at me?" I whispered

"Why am I mad?!" he cried " because I thought you loved me ally. I really Believed you could mend me. but I was wrong"

By now My Herat had sunken down to my feet. seeing the man I love standing I front of me, absolutely Herat broken KILLED me inside and out.

"Just... leave now" Adam said softly in my ear as he gently led me to the TDG bus.

Once I stepped in I collapsed and bawled my eyes out, but I soon managed to stand up and look through the window by the door. Jason was still standing there, a look of horror and disgust on his face. he then turned away and pulled something out of his pocket and SWEAR I saw a flash of silver. I just pushed it to the back of my mind and went to shower.

After washing my hair and body, I sat down on the cold marble floor of the shower and thought through what had just happened.

I had lost him.

I tried not to think about it and think about how amazing this tour was Gonna be, but I couldn't get the image of the flash of silver I saw when Jason pulled something from his pocket out of my head. was it a knife? was he gonna cut himself to death? I couldn't live with myself knowing I coursed him to do that. but maybe it was just his keys. who knew?

I wrapped my towel around my body and walked into brads room to change.

After three hours I was completely calmed down and I realized that Jason was probably okay and to try and take my mind off things, Adam and Neil had taken us all into a forest and set up a big circle of logs with a fire in the middle. I was really sweet.

"Hey" I heard a soft voice say from behind me. I spun around to see who it was, but instantly turned back to Barry to pitch into his conversation.

"Oh come one ally! don't be like that!" Matt moaned.

"EXCUSE ME?!" I screamed making everyone around me jump.

I lunged at him and tackled him to the ground. "DON'T YOU EVER TELL ME NOT TO BE LIKE THIS WHEN YOU MADE MY SUICIDAL OBSESSED BOYFRIEND SO PAINED!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"You the one who pained him ally" he said softly once he managed to escape from underneath me.

All I could do now was stare at him. I was breathing heavily from my outbursts; steam foaming out my mouth from the cold, but I did realize that all this was me. I was the only one hurting Jason by cheating.

"Oh my god" I whispered to myself. "OH MY GOD!! WHY DID YOU LET ME DO THIS!? ADAM WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP ME?!" Tears were yet again streaming down my stale cheeks.

"Well baby I thought you could make your own decisions now that your eighteen" Adam said softy as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Don't touch me!" I spat and slapped his arms away. "Just all of you stay the fuck away from me! i hate you all!!!"

I started walking towards the open door of the bus with the tv blaring loudly when all I heard was

"Jason Macentire's dead body was found just around the corner from the local dairy in Ontario after committing suicide for an un-known reason"

I froze. I just froze. this was just another joke Matt was playing on me, right?... it wasn't. he was gone and it was all my fault.

"Ally I'm so sorry.." Doug started. he reached out and touched my elbow, but I pulled it away and stormed into the bus.

I ran into the bunk alley and later down in Adams bunk. I planted my face in his pillow and cried my Herat out until I had no fluid left in my body and passed out.

I just couldn't believe he was gone. the man I fell in live with to fix. than I really believed I could prevent from committing suicide...and I failed. just like I always do.

OMG I AM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT!!! ND THE SHORTNESS!!! I WILL UPDATE SOON AND HAVE A LONG CHAPTER!!!

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