Depressing One Shots

I'll Never Be With You

But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
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I couldn't take it anymore. I had tried - I really had - but it was no use. Although there were people who cared about me, nothing felt worth the stay on this terrible earth for another second.
My biggest regret was leaving behind my boyfriend, Jamie. In the past, we had discussed the topic of my suicide, and the impacts it'd have on his life. That had been the thing to stop me from doing the terrible murder of myself for so long. At that moment, though? I felt so useless to him. Like I was just another girl who was being terribly clingy to him. He didn't love me; it was just lies. Rotten, heartbreaking lies.
I looked down from the bridge I was stood on. The drop was abnormally large, and the speeding cars made the situation more frightening.
I was so ready to go.
Before my depart from the world, I wanted to say my final goodbye to Jamie. Grabbing my phone from my bag, I typed out a text: 'Goodbye, I love you.'
No less than 3 minutes later, his concerned texts appeared on the screen on my phone. I didn't care. Not anymore.
I thought of my family and I thought of my friends and I thought of my enemies and I thought of the people who hated me and I thought about my acquaintances. Their lives would change. I didn't care. It wasn't like I was that important anyway.
I looked down at the cars again. Red, silver, silver, black, grey, red, blue, pink. I observed the people walking along the road, with huge smiles on their faces or ice creams or angry parents shouting at their children. It was sad. Really sad. I wanted to turn back time.
My childhood was taken away by my best friend, Skylar. She bullied everyone, but made it out to be their fault. My God, she got the adults well. She got everyone. That was probably her plan in the first place, to turn everyone against me. At first it was debatable. However, her lengthy complaints about me and things I didn't even do led to the entire class leaving me forever. The threats on her ruler that she made look so similar to my handwriting and signed it by me made Anna believe the lies. Soon enough, Sasha (Anna's best friend) was believing everything, and she spread it to Bella. It continued like that, until Eva plotted with Skylar and Evan to begin bullying me. The rest of the girls found this hilarious, for some reason, and they all joined in. Eventually, the boys began to believe the lies, and Josh began to hit me, along with everyone else. That is how the whole class hated me in primary school.
In high school, it just continued. Skylar spread the lies with the new people in the new school, and it just got worse from then. I won't go into anymore detail.
I looked left, and I looked right. I begged to be saved. My life was depending on someone finding me right before I jumped and staying here for longer, fixing everything. In an ideal world, somebody in a car passing over the bridge would have got out and questioned my actions. Everyone in the world was so inconsiderate.
Looking down at my phone, I re-read the concerned texts from my significant other.
"Kendall, please just listen to me. I love you. You don't need to do this. Where the hell are you? I want to help you, please."
"You can't do this to everyone! Think about your actions!"
"Oh my God, please listen."
These just didn't pass this time. I was fed up of feeling unloved by him. Jamie was saying all of this because he felt as though he had to, not because he cared. He never did. It was so obvious. He said that he loved me half the amount of times that I told him. He would literally never respond to my sadness. He just, ugh, it was so obvious that he hated me.
I was ready to go. Definitely.
Stepping up onto the bottom bar, I observed the world around me for the final time. Nobody shown any concern at all. Then, I began slowly bringing myself further up until it was easy enough to lift my legs over the bar. I was officially on the other side. It was my final chance to turn back, but I didn't. I'd got that far, so why stop?
For a few moments, I just felt the wind blow my hair everywhere and listened to the daily sounds of the world. Still, nobody expressed any concern over me at all. Rude.
Lifting a foot off the bar was terrifying. I saw my life crumbling in front of my eyes. Despite my worries, I was eager to die.
It was time.
After a count to three mentally, I lifted both of my hands off and took my jump.
The way down felt like forever. I appreciated the small things in life in my last few moments. You know the feeling when you go down a drop on a roller coaster, but the roller coaster is just boring because it's - like - for children, so it feels like forever? That was the feeling I got.
Filling my lungs with the last breath of air I ever got was horrible. I realised that every problem was fixable, but there was no going back.
The floor was centimetres away. I screamed. By this point, cars driving were swerving and gasping and stopping. The lines became backed up.
I hit the ground, and that's when my silly life ended.
Many people were gathering around me, some calling for an ambulance. They actually had hope in me surviving. Was education really that bad? Obviously, after such a drop, no one would survive it. Not even, I don't know, John Cena.
An ambulance arrived and took me away to the hospital, and I was announced dead not much longer after the event occurred.
A few days later, my funeral took place. People who I didn't even think cared about me turned up. Skylar and the gang turned up, full of fake sympathy and 'tears'.
Jamie grasped the opportunity to talk at my funeral.
"She was the most beautiful girl anyone could ever meet. Even after all the things that happened, she kept a smile on her face, although it was more than likely fake. She had a personality of gold, and was there for me whenever I needed her. If you were one of her bullies, and you know who you are, I hope you realise that you are the reason that another beautiful soul was taken away from us. Kendall, if you're listening, because I know you're somewhere out there - somewhere far away - I love you a hell of a lot. I want you back. Gosh, the pain you have caused me is unreal. You're the talk of the town. Do you hear me calling? Every night I'm hoping you hear me. In hopes, you're talking back to me from heaven or wherever you are. Perhaps I'm just a fool. I can't do this. Summary: a beautiful girl has been taken away from this terrible world and I will not be able to get through this week without her. Now, I'll never be with you. Ugh, I hate myself."
Other people gave words of sympathy, and that was basically it. Jamie, like he said, didn't go back to school for at least 2 months and his appetite disappeared altogether. He never fully got over it, he just learned to live with it.
Most of my class regretted all of their actions. Skylar actually followed me no longer after, since it got too bad for her. Everyone knew that it was her fault in the beginning, so she had to take the blame. She couldn't even take it for a month, never mind the 6 years she spent calling me all kinds and hitting me at any opportunity.
Eva and Evan were attacked the second most, so when Skylar was gone they were the main targets. They were the entire reason this started. The origin of the bullying gang. They feel guilty most of the time, and their grades have dropped dramatically.
As for me, I sit here and watch what goes on in everyone's lives. I laugh at all of the well deserved bullying Eva and Evan get, and I don't know how I feel about the fact that Skylar died. After all, she was my best friend before it all began, but I could never forgive her for what she put me through for no apparent reason.
Death is something you do not want to experience early. I don't recommend. People care and things get better, just think of that.
I'm Kendall, and that was my story.