Conflictions

Broken pieces

They say that all pain eases with time, but I don't think that's true. In all honestly I think you just learn how to hide it. That's not to say it hurts any less, it's just means that every time the pain becomes too unbearable you push it as far back as you can. It's a coping mechanism and without it we wouldn't be able to function in the real world and at the end of the day, isn't that all it comes down to? Putting that smile on your face & standing with your back a little bit straighter? Well. That's exactly what I did this morning as I got ready for school.

****

Like the first day of school, the second went by relatively slow. Honestly it felt like an eternity went by before it was the last day of the week. Although we've only had four days of school, it feels like we're months into it. Sighing, I make my way to the lunch hall, filling my tray with various pieces of food and join my group of friends who are already seated.

"Hey hans." I'm greeted with as I take a seat.

"Hey guys." I smile as I sit down.

Looking around the table I see Layla and Charlie having their own discussion, Derek lost in his phone and Tom, Rachel and Zain arguing about something. I've known the group since the start of year 7, except for Derek and Zain who joined the group in year 9. We all clicked and have basically been joined by the hip since.

"Hans back me up here, didn't Mrs Lebet leave because she cheated on her husband with Mr Mitchel in Science?" Zain asks me.

"That's what I heard, but you know how the rumour mill is here." I reply taking a bite out of my sandwich.

"Exactly! For all you know it could be for any other reason." Rachel reasons.

"Na, no way! We've all seen how chummy those to were eh." Tom jumps in nudging Zain.

"They were not, whenever I saw them their behaviour did not look flirtatious in the least!" Rachel defends Mrs Lebet.

"Why do you even care Rache, this entire conversation is pointless guys." Derek sighs looking up from his phone.

"Because,'' she gestures, "they're just feeding into the schools idiotic rumour mill. Half the stuff that gets spread isn't even true!" finishing with an exasperated tug at the ends of her copper red hair.

"Oh come on Rache! It's not as if it gets started from thin air, there must be some truth to it." Zain argues back.

"Seriosuly why do you guys always have to assume the worst. There's no point in talking to you narrow minded twats." Rachel huffs annoyed

Amused, I finish the rest of my sandwich, listening to the banter as the three of them go back and forth on their meaningless argument. As everyone else is engaged in one discussion or the other, I can't help but zone out and look around. Looking up I'm surprised to see the boy with the grey eyes, a few tables away. It really shouldn't be so much of a surprise seeing him as he obviously goes to our school, but my eyebrows raise in spite of it - it's as if he always seems to catch me off guard. He's talking animatedly to Liam, a guy from our year, hands gesturing in heated discussion and eyebrows drawn down in concentration. A moment and a sharp retort from Liam later, he's laughing out loud, eyes crinkling and even from where I'm sitting, I can see the genuine amusement in them. He's handsome if I'm being honest, but not in the traditional sense, make no mistake though, because he's definitely attractive. He has a defined jaw line that no doubt drives girls crazy and his short brown hair does nothing but add on to his already handsome features. I find my gaze lurking dangerously at hip length, slightly confused as to how it got there, when I realise that he's stood up and that I haven't moved an inch. I haven't noticed before as whenever I've seen him he's been sitting down, but he's tall, long legs eating up cafeteria tile floors as he makes his way through. I only have a side view as he absently surveys the posters on the wall, but I can see he's lean, a light carving of muscles loosely defined by the jeans and simple t-shirt he's wearing. Looking at him, it's safe to say most if not the entire female poplutaion at Holstead High will go cray for him, and like all guys I highly doubt he'll be complaining. Rolling my eyes I turn back to the table just, as the guys discuss plans for us to meet up over the weekend to hang out.

"So we're all agreed then, saturday 2pm at the bowling alley?" Tom asks looking around the table.

He's met with a chorus of yes's, as the chair besides me is pulled up.

"S'up Jake." Tom nods his head in my direction, as Jake takes a seat besides me.

Turning to my left I smile at Jake as a way of greeting. I'm not going to lie I do feel slighlty awkward around him, but I don't want to make things any more weird than they are.

Smiling back at me, he replies "Nothing much man, how are you guys?"

"Meh, you know first week of shcool, so I can't complain yet." Zain laughs.

"How are you so laid back, It's only friday and I've got a shit load of work already!" Rachel exclaims incredulously.

"Well unlike some, I'm actually ahead on my work." He smirks at Rachel.

"Bs. There's a better chance of seeing a flying pig." She snorts.

"Is there actually a time in the day when these two aren't arguing?" Jake asks me smiling with a shake of his head "

Chuckling I reply "I would definitely pay to see that."

"So how've you been? Haven't seen much of you lately." He asks me.

Before I can answer I'm interrupted by Charlie saying "We've got to print out some stuff for business studies, so we'll see you guys later." as, her and Layla gather their things to leave.

Waving to them I turn back to Jake and reply "I've been good, just stressed out with school work despite that we're only a week in."

"I know what you mean, I don't know how we're going to survive for a term let a one a year." He

"It'll be so much worse once we're in uni!" I groan.

"I reckon it'll better since we'll doing something we're actually passionate about, rather than this crap." Jake

"Yeah, but we'll still be stuck in the education system." I sulk

"Ever the optimist Hans." He laughs.