(alternate universe where Dally doesn't die but Johnny still does) (another side note: I couldn't decide whether to do this in 1st or 3rd person so I just stuck with 1st. Maybe I'll convert it to 3rd another day)
I needed to get away.
The car engine revved and vibrated as I shoved the keys into the ignition, fumbling miserably.
I slapped the steering wheel with my hands and leaned my head down, cursing. A lump began to form in my throat, but I fought it back.
"Fuck you, Dallas, fuck you," I said to myself and gripped the wheel in front of me even harder.
I felt like someone had punched me hard in the chest. Every time I inhaled, a sharp pain would spread throughout my body. Exhaling was the only thing that didn't hurt.
I brought myself to lift my head up and stare at the road in front of me. It was still. No dust flying, no headlights breaking through the thick darkness...nothing.
The silence hung heavily around me. It felt like it was weighing down my shoulders and it became hard to keep my head up. I closed my eyes and tried inhaling. A sharp pain continued to travel through my body and I exhaled until I couldn't breathe anymore.
I snapped my eyes open and shoved my foot down on the gas pedal. Dust flew out from behind me and a rush of adrenaline ran through my body. Wind thrashed around me, and I almost felt invisible. It felt like it was going right through me.
And at that moment, I wished I was invisible.
I didn't stop driving. I didn't want to. The only thoughts running through my head were the tan-skinned, dark haired, chocolate eyed boy.
I remembered the times he would shove his hands into his pockets and look up at me. The way his eyes reflected hurt yet still had a soft look to them puzzled me. How such a broken kid could still care so much.
I kept driving, keeping my focus on the road in front of me. It began to get blurry. It was all a flash and I could barely see anything in front of me.
My mind drifted off again.
When that kid was determined, that's all he would focus on. He stood up for stuff. Yet, he still couldn't stand up to his parents. I wanted them dead. I wanted his asshole parents dead. They don't deserve a kid like him. And now that kid is gone.
That kid is dead.
That kid with the soft brown eyes. That kid with the scar across his face and many more across his heart.
You can't get rid of scars, but they do fade.
I wanted to be the one to make his scars fade. I wanted to be the one to make his lonely eyes light up. I wanted to be the one to show him the world.
That kid...
A slammed my foot down on the brake.
I leaned over the steering wheel and let a cry escape my lips. I was in an unfamiliar area. It was dusty everywhere and pitch black. Everything around me was black. I could barely see anything in front of the car that wasn't illuminated by the headlights.
A warm tear slid down my cheek. Then another. And another and it all just came down on me at once.
"Fuck you, Dally!" I screamed and slammed my wrist on the dashboard. I felt a sharp pain, and cradled my arm in my hand. I fell over onto the seat and let another cry out.
Why couldn't I have saved him? It was all my fault. He's dead now. I could've done something. I fucked up.
I fucked up the one thing that I had the chance to do right. I had the chance to save him. I could've grabbed his sleeve and told him not to run into that church. I could've ran after him right away.
But, I didn't. And I would never be able to fade his scars. They would be passed on to me. His scars would now be mine.
