S H A T T E R E D

Mom.

I know I was rude for leaving Harry but I honestly am not in the mood to flirt. I was expecting Harry to chase after me. I certainly didn't want him to though. So I was relieved when I got to my car without another sign of him.

I drove home very slowly, I'm in no rush to hear my mother's cruel words. I'm not really sure what I did to make my mom be so bitter towards me. She always has been, since I can remember anyway. Don't get me wrong I love her but she can be really cruel to me. When I arrive to my house my mothers car is outside and I take a deep breath in attempt to prepare myself. Although I know I will never get used to her remarks.

I walk through the door quietly in attempt that she will not hear me. I am holding my breath, tiptoeing through the house, I'm so close to my room when I hear my mothers voice "Lily? Get your ass in my room now" Great, here we go again. "Yes mom" I say in the most polite way possible, I don't want to anger her anymore. "What the hell happened last night? Why did you leave? What did you even do? You could have gotten raped! You're fucking dumb you know that Lily! You are just retarded! You actually think you live in some stupid fairytale and you can just run away from home and then come back and ill realize how much I love you?"

My eyes flood with tears and I hate every word she says. I cry hysterically feeling so low. She continues with her yelling. "Well that's not happening you are so stupid Lily! I have a retard for a daughter, didn't I raise you better! God Lily I don't even want to look at you. You're a fucking disgrace get out of my sight."

I leaving my mothers room crying and walk into my room close the door behind me and slide down until I hit the floor. I sit there just pulling at my hair. I'm so worthless, such a disappointment. My mother hates me and I hate myself. My mind is going through so many thoughts and I find one of my razor blades, so upset with myself I want to leave this world. I begin to cut at my wrists, not even worried about the pain.