House of Cards [ON HOLD]

Chapter Seventeen: Mia?

Chapter Seventeen: Mia?

Give me another chance?

Those 4 words engraved in my mind for the rest of the week ever since Austin dropped that bomb question.

Of course, I didn't answer him, because I, too was confused. I already knew I have feelings for Quinn, but now why am I second guessing the conclusion I had come up with?

Which is; that I wanted to have a go and take risk being in a relationship with Quinn.

Why? Why does this have to be so difficult?

Why am I know having mix emotions towards Austin?

I should be angry with him! No, I should loathe his whole existent ever since he decided to put his stick out there in the wrong hole!

Well, not like we had sex or anything. Nothing like that! Figurative speech.

But I don't. I don't loathe him, I was still a little hurt since he opened up old wound for me when he asked the question. And worse... he salted it, by looking at me with those hopeful eyes.

I wasn't sixteen anymore, in all two years, a lot can happen. Time changed people. People changed people.

It's just a fucked up cycle that no one can get out into.

I took a heavy sigh, my chest tight from all of the emotions that swirl within me. With each alternating beat, each scream two different names.

Quinn?

Austin?

Why is it making me choose?

Because you can't have both, Sadie? Know who's really in your heart that you want. It's either stay with him, or leave him.

Can you even guess which is which? Who is 'stay with him?' and who is 'leave him?'

At the moment, I harboured a great migraine from all the thinking. All I wanted to do was do something bad... bad. Where I can take my anger out. I want to wreck something... but I already had.

My own heart. I had wrecked my own heart from being torn between two boys.

This shouldn't be happening if I only kept my distance away from Quinn. Either way... I choose or not choose, people will get hurt. It's inevitable, unstopable. It seems like wherever I go, I end up hurting a lot of people. I end up making them cry instead of laugh.

And I always end up thinking that being gone from their lives would give them a much better opportunity to be happy again.