Falling Shadows (The Ellocea chronicles) [#Wattys2016]

Two

It was a week until the festivities would begin and he'd have to parade through the village smiling as if he were enjoying feeling like the world's prize turkey. Velemir the Sand Chief, Nandini the princess of the River people and Tor the leader of the Skylle would be among the hundreds of guests that would be attending the numerous feasts and celebrations that would mark his coming of age. He tried to make himself feel excited if not for him then for the sake of his father who looked as if he'd explode with excitement at the arrival of this pivotal event in the life of his eldest son. He really wanted to absorb some of the jovial spirit that seemed to be rolling off his beaming father in waves, but a stone had settled in his stomach and all his efforts felt forced and fake. His mother could see straight through his pretence and soon after he'd escaped from the thrown room, he heard her knock on his door.

"I still fail to see what you're so worried about, Zahni," a faint crease had formed between her brows and her teal eyes held a deep concern that only a mother's could achieve. "If its about having to grow up and accept some responsibilities, then I'm sorry to say, but it's life and it's inevitable."

She moved over to the chaise that sat in his chambers, and waited for him to turn and face her, she'd always worried about how she often felt she lost her eldest son to thought as a mist seemed to cover his golden eyes and his brows would furrow as if he were trying to remember something that kept slipping away. She wished she could take away all his concerns and keep him, frozen in time, as the young boy who would run through the courtyard with his wooden sword, fighting the bushes and the pillars. A faint smile danced on her lips at the memory, he'd since grown into a strong warrior who would one day make a great Kahn.

"Kalizahni please face me when I'm speaking to you, you know fair well that it is the height of bad manners to turn your back on a conversation, especially one with your own mother,"

The stern tone in her voice and the use of his full birth name made him wince as he turned towards her and the room. "There we are, not so hard is it?" a small smile played on her lips as her teal eyes swam with concern. "Now would you like to share with me what has you looking like you've just fallen from your horse?"

His eyes sparked for a tiny moment at his mother's words, about to burst out in defence of his pride at the allegation, but stopped as he saw the seriousness in her eyes.

"I...I don't know mother, I-" he answered with resignation his mask faltering for a moment his emotions showing learning on his face, but as quickly as a still pond is disturbed by a raindrop his emotions were hidden again in the deep pools of gold that were his eyes. "No it doesn't matter. I'm not worried, Mother, really I'm excited," She looked at him with an all-knowing expression that told him she knew he was hiding the truth.

"Well then, just remember if you do feel like telling me what's bothering you so deeply I'll willingly listen and, if you need it, advise. Now get some rest as we still have a lot of preparations to make before your parade." He lowered his head so she could kiss it as she always had since he was an infant, and watched as she left the room, smiling lovingly as she closed the door. He heard her share some words with the guards outside the door and once he knew she was gone he walked over to the foot of his bed and flopped down onto its soft fur blankets.

Looking up at the stylishly panelled wood ceiling he tried to dissect his thoughts. It wasn't that he didn't want to tell his mother how he was feeling as he was often very honest with her, it was something he loved about their relationship, the fact was that this time he was struggling to comprehend what he was feeling and whats more he couldn't understand why he was feeling the way he was. He loved parties, the splendour and cheer that they brought, he even loved visiting the villages and meeting their people that lived outside of the palace walls, finding out what needed to be done for the people and seeing to it that it was taken care of. He remembered times when, as a young boy, he would visit the villages just to play with the other children, he'd felt so happy from such simple games that even now he felt his eyes crinkle in a smile at the memory. It then dawned on him that he would probably never feel that way again, now he was coming of age he would have duties to fulfil and more important matters to attend to, it would be the turn of his younger siblings to enjoy the pleasures of being a child. He then thought of how he'd soon be expected to marry, he'd be someone's husband, he felt the foreign word on his tongue and screwed up his nose in distaste. All the women he'd ever been exposed to had either been old enough to be his mother, or so caked in powder and paints he could barely see their true faces. And their conversations, he had to stifle a yawn just at the thought of how dreary they had all sounded to him, all asking the same questions and him never being sure if they were interested in him or just in the power that he would give them. He knew, though, that it was an inevitability, he would have to marry to strengthen alliances and bring heirs to rule in the valley after him. All these thought were swirling around his mind each adding weight to the unbelievably heavy rock that sat in his stomach. He became lost in his thoughts that he hardly noticed his eyelids growing heavier and closing and sleep consume him.