Drowning

I Busted Her Chops Adam...but I Loved Her

Joan had packed the last of her bags, this was going to be a lot harder than she had anticipated but it needed to be done. She just hoped they wouldn't hate her for it, "Adam!" She called out to him, "I need help with my luggage" she wasn't about to attempt to bring the heavy cases down the stairs alone.

She heard him stomp up the stairs, she knew he was terrified. They spent the previous night going over Marcus' medical records, his doctors, therapists and his appointment schedule. School hadn't  worked out as well as Marcus would've hoped so he was being placed on 'home bound' status, meaning his teachers would come to the house during the week.

All of this was difficult to handle with a 9-5 job, it was almost impossible to do on Adam's schedule which is what led to him taking an open ended leave.

"Are you sure you can't stay?" Adam begged, "we need you...this family needs you"

He wasn't pulling any punches, "Adam, I hate leaving...but you guys need to be a family again..without me."

"I don't know if we can" he sat on the bed, "I'm lost Joan.."

She sat beside him and placed her hand on his leg, "Adam, you can do this. I know it's hard..it's unbelievably hard...they need you Adam..more than ever before"

"They hate me"

"No, they don't. Adam, they miss their mother and they miss you.." Joan said softly, she knew her words had stung him, "this is hard for everyone including you"

They gathered in the living room for a tearful goodbye, it was the first time Emily had sought out Joan her arms wrapped around her grandmother's waist as the tears fell from her eyes, Claire too was in tears.

Marcus sat in his chair, his eyes focused on his hands.

"You kids be good for your dad...promise to call me everyday and I will be back for the holidays" she dragged her fingers under her eyes wiping away the remnants of her tears, "I love you all so much" she turned to Adam, "you can do this, I have faith in you...Kim does too" her voice tight with emotion, "They need you Adam..and you need them"

He nodded, "Thank you for everything, we couldn't have gotten this far without you" he heard the horn of the taxi, "well, this is it"

Just like that Adam was left to deal with his three children on his own, he'd allowed himself to be consumed with his grief he had tried to fight it off, to rise above it but with Joan staying with them it was easy to let her take over.

That was done, and he needed to be the life line for his family, he wouldn't let them drown in their grief. He owed it to Kim and he owed it to his children.

He'd barely slept an hour when his alarm started blaring, he needed to get the girls up and fed, showered and dressed and then he'd move on to Marcus and his full day of therapies.

"C'mon girls! Rise and shine!" He called into Claire's bedroom the two had slept in the same room since the night of the shooting and he didn't think they'd ever separate now. Claire had become Emily's 'voice', she anticipated Emily's every need and desire.

He could hear Claire grumble something as she rolled over, he could hear Emily's feet hit the ground as she jumped down from the top bunk.

He peeked in on Marcus who was still out cold, his heart ached for his son as his eyes landed on the wheelchair that was butted up against his bed. He'd give anything for his little boy to be able to walk again.