Phil and I are best friends. We have been ever since we've met. I love him. That's just how things are.... or were.... Before it happened. But I will get to that, I promise. But for now let me tell you about Phil and I.
Just to clarify, we aren't a couple. We are just extremely close. I am socially awkward and weird and over all unlikable. Phil is the sun in my dark life. Phil is a sunny person and he likes almost everything/ everyone. But trouble usually finds him. Sometimes it is just minor stuff like getting attacked by a squirrel, me, or forgetting something at the market. This time was beyond everything bad that had ever happened to him, and he honestly needed me. Now I'm not going to say I regret what I did, because I didn't, I actually enjoyed it, but I know Phil didn't appreciate that I did had as much fun doing it as I did.
I'm just going to point out now that if you have a weak stomach and can't handle gore and drugs and shit, you might as well leave now. This is NOT some fucking fairytale.
This is what happens when you fuck with me or my best friend. This shit messed me up and I'm trying to get better, for Phil.
My name is Dan fucking Howell and I'm going to tell you the story of the time my best friend, Phil Lester, was taken from me and how I got him back.
