As You Were

10. What I Left Behind

His lips were tickling mine, and I laughed as he pressed a little too hard, our teeth crashing into each other's. He didn't find it all that funny though, and he muttered an apology under his breath as he tried again, doing a little better this time. I'd been trying to teach him how to kiss for a couple weeks now, but he was pretty bad at it and had yet to improve. Still, at least I found his failure cute; the way he'd get so flustered and give up. Now he was trying too hard, barely touching his mouth to mine afraid to have a repeat of what he'd just done. Apparently he didn't see the error in it.

"Relax, Alan," I told him, pushing him off of me so that I could speak.

"I'm sorry, Eli. I'm just no good at this." Alan rocked back on his heels and took off his hat, folding the bill and wiping the sweat off of his forehead. I'd known him since I was small, Alan, but it was only recently that I had found out he was like me. It was a funny coincidence really, the way it all came about. I'd been shopping at the store with mama for groceries last month when I saw him checking me out—he was a bagboy there. Maybe no one else would have thought anything of it, but I knew the look he was giving me because it was one I couldn't help but to give a few of the other boys around town too.

I'd waited until he got off work that night, telling dad and mama that I had to go back for apples, and when he started walking home I caught up with him and we got to talking. Honestly I almost couldn't believe myself as I came right out with it—that was very risky on my part—but I guess I was just certain. Anyways we got to talking and stuff and then we just ended up practicing our kissing out in the old, abandoned Gilman barn. And I say practicing loosely because it wasn't like there was much work that I needed to do, but the same couldn't be said for Alan.

Not to pat myself on the back but I was quite surely adept when it came to kissing, and if I were being truthful I would have to say that I learned most everything I knew from Jill Tenney. She was my steady girlfriend all throughout middle school, and she was a grabber. Still, I owed her a right debt of gratitude because I never had a woman after that utter any complaints. Neither did Alan. I wasn't too broken up that Jill and I drifted apart the summer before high school, after all, she soon developed a certain reputation around town that she still maintained to this day.

Alan had been less fortunate. He wasn't terrible looking or nothing like that, but I wouldn't exactly say that he was a looker either. Instead, he was just plain with a plain personality to match. If I listed off all the girlfriends he ever had I could count them all on one hand, with one finger. Yep, easy guess, Jill. But he was a nice enough guy anyway and the only other one like me that I'd ever known about. That seemed impossible, that we could be the only ones in the whole town going back all those years, but that seemed to be exactly the way it was. Oh well.

"You've already gotten much better with my help." I smiled and stood up off the floor, peeking through the cracks in the wall to the dying light outside. Already the frogs and crickets were starting to sing, and I knew my parents would be wondering what was keeping me so long.

"You're just saying that." His accent was thicker than mine, and I figured that was probably because his family came from out of state originally. I wasn't sure where. Most of the families that made up our small town had been here for several generations, including mine. My great, great, great granddaddy had actually helped to found and build our community from the ground up, and I was part of one of the oldest bloodlines. Alan and his family were first generation.

"We'll pick back up tomorrow." I laughed again, grabbing my blanket up off the floor and heading out of the barn. He followed close behind me all the way until we got to where we had parked our trucks, off the road near some trees. Very discreet. Then I gave him one last shot at a kiss before we parted ways and I got into my vehicle. I waited while he started his up and pulled away, taillights disappearing into the distance. When I'd sat there for a moment longer I twisted my key in the ignition and started on my way home, not taking any more time than I had to.