Hopelessy Devoted

Chapter Seven: Worth

I'm scared as Hell as I miss school this morning. I told Daddy that I needed to see the doctor because I thought I had ahsma- of course he was concerned, but I told him I was adult enough to go by myself.

It scared me the other day- the thought that I could be pregnant. I'm only a senior in high school, I didn't want this. I didn't ask to be raped. I didn't ask to throw away my honor and pride- have people see me as a whore. I was pure. I am pure, but part of me was stolen. If I am pregnant....how can I have this baby? I'll be like those teen moms on that stupid show. People will spread vicious rumors, Zach will hurt me and the baby, my Dad will be disappointed- everyone will judge me. Well, not everyone, Daryl won't. Daryl has been judged so much the only person he judges is himself. It's like he's a cell under a microscope, but everyone makes him out to be a perasite. He's a good guy, smart, friendly- well to the right people, and just very sweet.

Driving into the doctors office, I'm so nervous. Goosebumps have taken over my body, my mouth is dry, and my head is killing me. What will be my fate?

****

"Well congratulations, Ms. Greene. Make sure you keep up on refilling your prenatals to keep the baby nice and strong." Dr. Jaqui Lance advises and I nod my head before leaving. In my hand, a picture of a tiny bean being that is growing inside me. Only about an inch long and half an inch wide. Wow. I pay my copay and step out onto the street, still in shock.

"Hey..."

"Ahhhhh!!!!" I jump at the unseen person who took another year off my life. Holding my chest, I gasp a big breath until I realize it's Daryl who scared me. "Daryl! Yer such a jerk!"

"Hahaha I'm sorry. I didn't figure ya were sleep walking."

"I wasn't." I say and grab the cigarette that he just lit and put in his mouth. Tossing it to the ground I stomp it out and he just looks at me, unphased by it. Pulling out his pack, he goes to take another one out and I snatch it, crinkle the pack, and toss it in the bed of a passing truck.

"Stop that." He growls.

"Stop doing stupid things that will kill you!"

"I ain't worried about that. I've been dead for years now."

"Harty har har! Yer so funny when yer depressed. I see you doing that again, yer gonna be sorry." I poke his chest and he just looks down at my tiny picture, when he notices the picture sticking out of my back pocket. Poking me in the forehead, I look up as he side steps around me, swipes the picture and leans against my truck door. Such a smooth cat he is. "Hey! Stop that!"

"So it's real now. Huh. Would've figured it had four eyes with that inbred, incestual prick."

"It's always been real...and don't talk about it that way. They're perfect." I take my picture back and gaze at the picture for a while before Daryl goes behind me and places his head on my shoulder, ass end sticking out, hands behind his back, and looks at the picture as well.

"I hope it doesn't look like Zach. God, I'd feel sorry for that kid."

"Will you just stop!" I turn around and shove him a bit. I don't know why I'm this angry and protective over something I didn't want a few weeks ago. I feel insane almost. He looks at me with those downward casted blue eyes.

"I'll just leave you alone." Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he sulks down the sidewalk and once more I feel terrible. He's so rough and course that sometimes I forget he is also very sensitive.

"Daryl, wait, don't go." I lightly jog after him and grab his hand. He stops and looks at my hand on his. It's cold and calloused, the more I look at it the more I realize the back of his hands and arms have scarred over cuts and gashes all over them. I don't know if he did this, or someone else. "You wanna go swimming?"

He doesn't say anything, but smiles ryely.

"Don't you have ta go to school?"

"I can take a day off to hang with a good friend." I smile sweetly and his eyes seem to sparkle almost. Taking him to the truck, I get in and we drive off to the quarry. The whole way, the hot wind whips around the cab of the truck as dirt flies up behind us. We laugh as Daryl and I tell hilarious stories about how the football team and wrestling team probably just play for the homosexual touches- laying on top of other guys and slapping butts. When we get to the quarry behind our house, we get out and I strip to just my undergarments, thanking God that they match and are cute today.

Standing close to the water, I dip my toes in and turn to look at Daryl, who I find still dressed and leaning against the front of my truck. The wind comes and catches my hair, so I hold it back with one hand as I wave for him to come on. He doesn't move, he just stands there staring at me. I look myself over to make sure I'm not as disgusting on the outside as I feel on the inside. Walking over to him, I smile up at him and start tugging his shirt off. As I get it up passed his belly button, he grabs my hands, forcing them to let go of his shirt. He looks down at me, upset and slightly tormented and I can't help but feel frightened. When he sees this, he loosens his grip and just pulls me close to his chest. He holds me there and I can feel his heart pounding in his chest.

"I don't wanna burn...I'll just go in in this." Looking down, he has jeans on and slips his shoes off his feet. He has no socks on, his shoes are holey amd his jeans are barely being held together, let alone stay on his body for the fact that they are too big. Letting go of me, he walks to the water and goes in passed his knees and sits down. I'm frozen on the beach because I miss his presence against me. Shaking myself out of it, I go to the water and sit beside him, the water almost passed my chest.

"You burn easily?" I ask him and he rubs the back of his head.

"Y...yeah....I usually stay inside all the time." He says and looks off at the cavernous wall of rock that rises before us. He looks like he's planning to break free of this 'cage' that has him so fixed. "How long before we find freedom?"

He mumbles under his breath and it is as though he didn't want me to hear it, but I did. When I'm about to answer, another voice sends shivers down my body.

"Dural! Where ya been brudder?" Turning around, an older guy, probably 25 or so comes sauntering across the yard, platinum blonde hair and chew in his mouth. He bears no resemblance to Daryl, except for the thick southern accent and his ability to scare the crap out of me. "Ooo, looks like ya got a girly friend."

"Shut up." Daryl stands up and becomes defensive as he stands in front of me, soaking wet.

"That's not nice Baby Brudder.... Who is yer friend by the way?"

"None of yer business Merle! Go home!" Daryl yells at him and I see now, the lustful look in Merle's gray eyes. He stalks towards us slowly, like a leopard hunting it's prey.

"Come on Dural. We can share 'er..." I never felt a person tense up so much in my life. It's a though he is a puppet and the master tightened his strings.

"Go away." He slowly growls and I hear the roar between them before I see Merle turn away and just leave. The conversation just died. The birds are chirping once more and all the tension in Daryl's body has melt away along with his anger. Turning around, he looks down at me in the water, slightly shaken by the encounter and he just smiles.

It is this smile that will always remind me that he won't let anything bad ever happen.