Snape's Diary

January 4th

Dear Diary,



Today was an odd day. It started with me going down to breakfast in my usual manner, giving out detentions as I go. First the fact that I had been assigned to fill in for Madam Hooch, as Physical Education Professor, for the day, because she was ill. This meant, unfortunately, that I had to take the gymnastics classes. I was not happy.  I slowly made my way down to the hall, when I got there I found a class of third years ready for their lesson. I retrieved from the teacher’s desk the lesson outline from Madam Hooch. I assembled the class into two lines, I read over the piece of parchment informing me of all the gymnastics floor positions the students had to learn. On there I found, Fluffy Squirrel, Swaying Daisy and Peaceful Lake. The titles of these ridiculous posses needed adjustment, I decided that I would teach the class a few of my own creation. I began with teaching them Depressed Tree, Retarded Hippogriff and Suicidal Goblin. For a moment I was enjoying myself. I taught them a few more, then I came up with a pose very close to my heart. I named it “Potter Under Cruciartus Curse”, it involved the students rolling on the floor squirming and screaming. This pleased me greatly. Later I followed the instructions on the sheet and made the class do hand stands, one fat Ravenclaw girl was struggling so much I had to help her by holding her feet upright. On her way down she “accidently” kicked me in the face. My face began to hurt, then I realized that her foul, yellow toe nails had cut my cheek. I gave her two weeks detention and dismissed the entire class. Slowly the bleeding stopped, and I made my way back up to the castle. I walked past the pool and noticed Potter and his Orange friend messing about. Suddenly the Orange one was under the water and unable to come up for air. Teacher protocol insisted I had to save him, I was wearing my best robes! I lunged into the pool, Potter swimming away from me in disgust. I released the Orange one’s robes from where they were caught at the bottom of the pool. I dragged him to the edge. He was, unfortunately, alright. I told him to get out of the pool if he knows what’s good for him. Then I remembered he was a Weasley and that he didn’t know anything. I got back to the castle, still dripping wet. I go to pull out my wand from my robe pocket. Only to find that it wasn’t there. I searched for my wand, but it was no where to be seen. Until tomorrow my diary.

Sincerely Severus