The princess in the tower

The prisoner

Sir Valiant awoke in the dark, weaponless, his leg chained to the stone. The only light came from a little window from the other wall. Somewhere in there, water fell, drop by drop, to the ground. He also could hear a strange noise slowly approaching. Clop, clop, clop.
"Who is there?" he called.
"King Alistair, the first. Who's asking?"
The sound came nearer, thou nothing was to be seen. Then, suddenly, a frog appeared in the light.
"I'm Sir Valiant. Are you a frog?"
"Of course not. What kind of question is that? I am a toad. Well, actually, I'm a king trapped in a toad's body. "

For Valiant, everything seemed to be going downhill since he entered that damned tower.
"That's not normal."
"Oh, you'd be surprised" the toad said as he jumped to the knight's foot. "Apparently it happens quite often. But there's also an easy solution to it. You can help me."
That could be something good. Maybe, if he helped the king, he would help free him. Obviously, he must have been bewitched by the princess and her lover.
"Well, what can I do?"
"You kiss me, I transform back into normal, and then we get married."
"Why would I want to kiss or marry you?"
"Why would I want to be a toad? I'm stuck here, you're stuck here, let's do it!"
"But I don't want to!" screamed Valiant.
"And I don't want to be a toad!" replied the toad.
Was he going mad?

"Are you trying to force someone to kiss you again, froggy?"
A tall and enormously strong man then appeared from the shadows.
"I'm a toad, not a frog! And someone has to kiss me! I can't eat one more fly!"
"I'd kiss you" the stranger offered.
"Would you then marry me?"
"Of course not, Alistair, you know I'm married. And I'm not that into men or toads anyway."
"But if you don't marry me, it won't work!!"
The man smiled.
"Maybe you could kiss my wife."
"But then I couldn't marry her."
"Sure you could. I'll be happier, she'll be happier, and you... Well, at least you'd be a man again, wouldn't you?"
The toad thought about it.
"Ok, maybe I'll try it tomorrow."
And so it jumped away.

The stranger, on the other hand, sat down next to Valiant and offered him a basket full of food.
"Thank you" the knight said surprised.
"Well, it's my job here, might as well do it right."
"I thought they only gave bread and water in the dungeons."
"I don't know how they do it in other places, but we are nice here, we don't want you to starve. "
He nodded and started eating.

"So, was king Alistair bewitched by the princess?" He asked when his belly was full.

"No, he messed around with a nymph. You should know never to flirt with a nymph if you aren't serious, 'cause they can get pretty pissed off. They are like teenagers. The princess, on the other hand, is a nice and smart young lady, she wouldn't harm a fly."

He grinned with irony.
"Then what happened to all the other knights and lords and princes that tried to enter into the tower and save her?"
"Oh, yeah, someone comes from time to time. I don't know who keeps telling the stories about sleeping beauties and ladies to be rescued. This is not a fairy tale. But people usually get lost, turn back home or decide to stay and make a living. We are quite nice fellas here, you know? We don't care about your riches or the lack thereof. I mean, our princess is marrying a farmer. Lord George, one of the men who came her searching for a dragon to slay, is now a minstrel. And Prince Henry fell in love with the baker's daughter... or maybe he fell for the pies? Anyhow, he married her and seems much happier now. He also weights a ton more."

As he saw that the prisoner had finished eating, he got up, took the basket and started walking away.
"See you tomorrow."
"Wait!" shouted Valiant. "How long will I stay here?"
"Don't worry. The trial will be soon. Besides, you won't be alone. The rats are very nice here too. They also have been bewitched. By someone named Hamelin, apparently. "

It was so, that Sir Valiant found himself faced with an unexpected, uncertain destiny.

And what, may you ask, is the moral of this tale?

Well:
Love is not love
if it is based solely on desire
Born from the groin with nothing above.
So maybe, just perhaps, don't follow an unknown lady
Because your pants are on fire.

Also, don't attack a beast that is sleeping,
Unless it is its fangs that you are seeking.

And if your animal asks for a kiss,
Give it for sure,
Then call your doctor.
Something may be amiss.

The End