The Titanic: A New Life

Chapter 8

I wept for what felt like hours.
I wept for my loving, beautiful sister who had done everything she could to keep me alive. I wept for my brother who had done everything with me; who I had loved and protected my entire life. I wept for my mother who never took care of us in the first place, but we still needed nevertheless.
There would never be funerals.
Nobody would remember them except for a broken child with an unknown heritage. Nobody would know me now.
The bodies of my loved ones were sinking to the bottom of the ocean as I cried.
I wept for the people I had lost and the father who had never had the chance to be there.
Now they were all together. They were just waiting on me.
The hole in my heart that would never be filled caused the pain equivalent of being crushed from the inside. All I had left of my family was the one blanket I had managed to pick up before we left. Marilynn's trunk had fallen into the water before I had a chance to snatch it.
As I wept, the woman next to me tried to comfort me on the small lifeboat with at least thirty other women and children and more I didn't even bother to count. I believe our skiff was the most tightly packed, as we were the last boat to hit the water.
"It's going to be alright, sweetheart," the woman had soothed sympathetically, trying to console me as we drifted across the water.
We were waiting for the rescue ships that had been signaled while the Titanic was still the unsinkable vessel. But no, I thought to myself. It would never be alright.
I examined the lady more closely to notice she resembled my mother with her beautiful blue eyes, like the ocean we were so desperately trying to escape.
"You aren't the only one who lost someone today."
I decided it was better not to ask who she had lost.
I kept silent as we stayed afloat, people lighting lanterns in the boats and pulling out what little food they had managed to bring, sharing it with other members on the boat.
The wind was less fierce as I wrapped my blanket around me, still stinging my eyes and prickling my skin with cold daggers of ice. I cast my forlorn gaze over the side of the little raft to keep myself from looking at the people around me, only reminding me of where we were.
I touched a finger to the water and created ripples, growing larger as they expanded across the soft waves that were slowly moving us in the opposite direction of the sinking Titanic.
I glanced out across the water, intending to see how far the circles went, and gasped at what I saw. A child was floating in the water!
She was still alive, struggling to stay afloat as the tide worked against her.
I was conflicted on what I should do. Should I just pretend I hadn't seen her? Should I just let her go? No, I told myself. No more deaths tonight.
Without a second thought, I jumped into the water, much to the dismay of the others. They had just started rowing the boat when I had decided to jump.
I swam out swiftly to where the girl was and securely wrapped my arm around her waist, using my free arm to paddle back to the awaiting boat. My fellow passengers gawked at me, amazed that I had jumped into the freezing cold water willingly. I now understood the value of life, and I wasn't going to let one go to waste.
I took a look at the girl who had fallen unconscious in my arms, without the ability to swim herself back to the raft. I couldn't get a clear image through my head as my eyes watered from the winds that had picked themselves back up, so I decided it best to focus on getting back to the watercraft.
My muscles ached when I reached the rim of the lifeboat, so much so I had to be pulled up into it by one arm. It was almost dislocated by the combined power of two people on the boat.
"Thank you," I said to them simply, my voice shaking as I shivered. The numbing ice water had chilled me to the bone, and I was quite happy to be back on that barge.
But I didn't care.
I had saved an innocent life.
I pulled my mop of soaking wet hair out of my face as I sat down, once again flicking my eyes out to scan the empty waters. The floating boats were like points on a map, evenly spaced on an otherwise blank canvas.
I turned back to the small girl in my arms and wrapped her in the only blanket I had brought on the small wooden canoe, stuffed with cold, grieving people. She needed it more than I did. Who knows how long she had been in that water?
Nobody had even bothered to try and take the child from me. No one besides me seemed to care, mainly because they were waiting for their families to return to them... if they were coming at all.
I shrugged internally as I slowly peered at the child in my arms.
I gasped once more when I saw her face.
She looked just like Marilynn! My sister, alive again!
I didn't know how they looked so similar, and how the one child I knew that resembled my sister had found me, but I didn't care one bit.
Maybe God really did care about me enough to give me a second chance at happiness.
I sighed in contentment as I brushed a light, golden stray hair away from the girl's face. She couldn't have been older than seven years old. Her eyes opened to reveal the same color irises as Marilynn's had been, startling me. Those gorgeous eyes stared at me with fear and confusion as she remained seated on the floor of the lifeboat, with her head on the lap of my skirt.
"Where's my mommy?" she asked me worriedly, staring up at me with those eyes, large and pitiful. She shifted to turn away after a moment to look out across the water, catching a glimpse of the sea that had trapped us so easily. I found it ironic that the sun was setting to the right, the direction in which she had turned. Because we would have been right to never board that cruise ship in the first place.
"I don't know," I admitted to her softly, stroking her hair to calm her. She remained motionless on my lap as I continued. "But I promise I won't let anyone hurt you. What happened?"
Normally, they teach you not to talk to strangers. But when one of those strangers is showing hospitality and the rest of your family is gone, sometimes they are the only ones you can turn to. And that is exactly what the little girl did.
"All I remember is getting shoved out a window by my mommy. She didn't seem to want me anymore..."
The girl's eyes turned to me once more, unshed tears glistening in the beautiful sea of her irises.
I knew exactly what happened. Her mother had seen her as dead weight that she hadn't needed. She was more worried about keeping herself alive.
I had known the pain of having a mother who didn't love me. I wouldn't let her feel that pain, too. She was too young. I decided not to tell her, lest I cause her more pain.
"My mommy isn't coming back, is she?" she asked solemnly. I paused and gave the child a reassuring hug.
"I honestly don't know," I confessed to her.
I felt connected to this child even though I had just met her. I knew I had to save her from that water. I had seen too many deaths to let another join the list.
Suddenly, the girl asked me, "will you be my mommy?"
She stared at me with pleading, hopeful eyes as she waited for my answer.
"Yes," I agreed after a moment of thought. "I will be your mommy if we can't find your real mother tomorrow."
She laid her head back down on my lap and sighed happily before she settled down to sleep. I was soon to learn that her name was Emily.