(Preview)

Brennan

From: Adalia

To: Brennan

Subject: I'm sorry

I know that when we were younger, I was a horrible sister to you. I

would ignore you, and would never want to play with you. I don't know

why I did it, but I deeply regret it. I miss you, Brennan... with all my

heart. I don't care if you think I'm "stupid" or "retarded" or "lame"

for sending you this, but I think you deserve an apology. I've gone

too long without sending you this. All these years... You've deserved

it.

Although we fought and argued when we were little, I miss it dearly. I

miss playing with you. I could, I would take it all back. I want you

to be my big brother, again. I want to be able to talk to you. To

actually have a pleasant conversation with you. To know that I'm not

alone.

I honestly don't know what changed you. Dad says you changed because

of your hatred and resentment towards me for what I did when I was

younger. That's probably true.

He told me that when I was in Nebraska with mom, you missed me and

wanted to play with me, too. I didn't know that. And really wish you

still felt that way. I wouldn't turn you down anymore. I didn't know

how lucky I was to have a brother like that. I took it for granted.

But please hear me out. I miss everything about my life. I wish mom

and dad were together again. I've heard you say you didn't care if

they were or not. That hurt me. I can't understand why you feel that

way. Don't you still miss how things used to be...? Anyway, if I can't

have that... I at least need one part of my childhood back. I need

you, B. Please be my brother again.

I know you've said you don't care about me. You probably don't care

that I'm hurting, anymore, but PLEASE. I would do anything to have it

all back. I at least need you.

You aren't the only one that's changed. I've changed, too. For the

better. I've become a better person.

I know you probably don't believe me when I tell you this, but it's

true. I am still a Christian, unlike you. When I was hurting, God

helped me. I was lying in my bed over the summer, thinking about

something completely irrelevant, and I had a sudden moment of

realization. I realized all the wrong things I'd done in my life, and

all the wrong things I did daily. I finally understood how sick and

cruel some people can be. I was motivated to change who I was. I'm

much more generous and kind, now, you know. Unfortunately, I'm too

scared to talk to you in person. I know you probably wouldn't listen,