New at This

Just the Introduction

A/N
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Quick a/n here even though most will skip. This story may be triggering. I'm basically going to throw up my life in here. I will try to mark the chapters. However, please understand that this is MY book. If I want to put REAL LIFE PROBLEMS IN HERE I CAN.   ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
That being said, I love you all. Enjoy:)
Also... The main character is Rian. (Pronounced Ryan not Rain)
AND this chapter has a very slight trigger warning for self-harm while introducing the characters.
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Ee: We could just run away

Rian: No we can't E. I have a girlfriend. A life. Expectations and responsibilities.

Ee: U don't like her. God, Rye. You're gay. Man up and tell her.

Rian: I will, give me time. U can't rush this Bae.

Ee: I love u but don't call me that until you can say it w/o guilt. Kay? Just do it... please? I want us to b together, but we can't if you're with her. You told me yourself, you would never screw a girl. Babe, last night was amazing. I've never felt like that b4. If you don't feel the same, you should tell me now.

I put down my phone. Me and my... Boyfriend-complicated-support-friend-person were exchanging texts. In all honestly, I just don't want to talk about it. I want to sleep until I can't remember anything.

My girlfriend, a beautiful cheerleader, has the potential to ruin my life. Especially since she knows my secret. Ever since freshman year, when I came to this school, I've lived as a guy. However, the vagina between my legs tries to say otherwise.

Ee, the super hot scene guy I have a crush on, is depending on me breaking up with Emily. The problem isn't that I like her. It's more that I don't hate her. I'm terrified of hurting her. I don't want to make her cry.

You see, Emily and I, we made a deal a month back. If I told her my deepest secret, she would tell me hers. Well, she cuts. At once, so did I. I don't want people to worry about me relapsing, but I'm not going to risk it for her.

I pick my phone back up and text Ee back.

Rian: It wasn't that great for me E. You know well that I can't have good sex in this body.

Ee: I told you I could show you how... You don't have to be ashamed with me Rye. I wasn't super honest with you when I said I'd never slept with a girl. If you just let me...

Rian: No. I told you that part of me is off limits. I can't do that. It's not who I am. At least not anymore.

Ee: I'm just saying we could try it. It's completely up to you and I won't pressure you into it. I know you're still new at this.

What did that even mean? New at this? New at what? Sex? Ugh. I swear that boy is so gonna get it. I admit there's a lot I don't know about, but sex is not one of those things. Maybe I haven't been with fifty different partners and got 3 STI's, but I read, okay?

Rian: I said no.

Frustrated, I put my phone down to see Emily storming towards me.

"Really Kris?" She asks me. Obviously I don't go by Kris, so this has to be serious. "A guy?"

"Um... What?" I ask her, confused.

"You slept with a guy?"

Face-palm. How'd she find out?

She kept talking before I could defend myself, not that I had anything to say. "Yes, I know. Don't act dumb with me. I was messing around Ethan and I took his phone. He had it on your texts. How long have you hated me?"

"I-I don't hate you, Em. I never did, that's why I couldn't tell you."

"Well I know now, so you can stop worrying about it and get back to your man-whore life." She said before leaning in close to my ear. "Or should I just say slut?" She whispered and walked away.

"Yay, Dobby is free." I muttered sarcastically. This might prove to be the worst year of my life.