Shattered || Narry

{21}

Harry

I had probably kept myself locked in my room for about a week. I heard all of Liam and Niall's pleas for me to come out of the room. All of Liam's begging for me to eat something. And most of all, I could hear Niall's cries of my name at night.

It took so much of me to hold back and not go into his room to calm him down. Every fiber of my being wanted to comfort him. But eventually, I had given in. I couldn't bear to hear Niall crying out my name like he was in pain. I had to comfort him. I just had to.

So I had stepped out of my room after about eight days. It was a little bit after one in the morning and Niall was crying out my name. I made my way to his room and opened his door as quietly as I could. I looked at Niall on the bed; he was whimpering and moving around a lot on the bed.

I shut the door quietly and walked over to the bed. I then climbed into the bed and wrapped my arms around him. I tried to calm him by rubbing my hand up and down his arm, but he was still whimpering; loudly I might add. So I turned him over so that he was facing me. I began to rub at his chest and he seemed to be calming down. I looked at his face and he looked like he was in so much pain. I didn't like seeing him like this. I just wanted him to calm down.

So I decided to softly sing to him.

"Oh no. Did I get to close? Oh, did I almost see what's really on the inside..." I was going to try my best not to get choked up. I really didn't want him to wake up and find me here with him. Not yet anyway. "All your insecurities, all the dirty laundry never made me blink one time..." I kept rubbing his chest; his face was slowly relaxing so my singing was doing good. "Unconditional. Unconditionally. I will love you unconditionally..." I took a deep breath, trying to choke back the sobs. I was still hurt by him not saying that he loved me back. "There is no fear now...let go and just be free..." I blinked away the tears that were now falling from my eyes. "I will love you unconditionally."

I sniffled and wiped away my tears. Niall was calm now and that's all that mattered to me. I hadn't stopped rubbing his chest soothingly. And even when I heard him softly sigh my name, I didn't stop.

"Harry?"

I stopped rubbing his chest but I didn't remove my hand when I heard his voice softly say my name.

"Yes, Niall?" I asked softly.

"Why did you decide on coming in here tonight instead of the other nights when this happened?"

I sighed and began to rub at his chest again. I sighed then kissed his forehead.

"Cause I couldn't bear the thought of you crying out for me again. I-I couldn't stand the fact that you were only having these bad dreams because of me. Y-you were having them because I was being an asshole and—"

"No," Niall grabbed onto my face. "No no no, Harry. You're not an asshole."

"Then what am I, Niall? A coward because I couldn't even defend myself when Zayn was telling you those things? Am I a little bitch for crying and getting upset all because you didn't say "I love you" back?"

"You're none of those things, Harry. You never have been and you never will be."

I forced a soft laugh.