Diary of a Dalek

Happy.

Dalek's Point of View

Dark, cold, empty. That's all I could see, feel, hear. It was blank, nothing. Was I dead? I really couldn't tell. I didn't feel anything. Death by self destruction I thought was suppose to hurt. I didn't even see a white light.

“...Do you think he's gonna be okay?” a concerned voice said from near by. It sounded like it was in my head. Like it was as some people say “a voice of an angel”.

“I dunno Rose.” there was another voice

A sigh.

I could hear a rustling sound and then nothing. Silence once again. I didn't think I was dead now. Unless of course it was “a voice of an angel” I didn't think that very likely though. For two reasons. One, being I was a Dalek, I didn't think they went to heaven, and two, pretty sure if I was in heaven, I would be able to see and the “voices” wouldn't be asking if I was okay or not. It's heaven of course you're okay.

I tried moving my legs and was surprised to see they actually worked. I opened my one eye and blinked a few times. It was still dark and I figured I was still in that hideous suit that I have. Using a leg to press a button, the suit opened and looked out.

I was stunned to see a smiling Rose and The Doctor with a clinical expression. I looked up to the blue sky. I was alive. I couldn't tell at the time if I was happy or sad. Now, I see that I was sad, but now, at this time, I'm happy.

Though it's been years since that date. That whole time, it's seems like forever ago, I choose not to ignore it. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it makes me glad that I had that chance that change from who I am now. I had the chance to do the very best thing and change my life around for the better.

The Doctor did find me somewhere, where I could help. It was weird at first, especially because people feared me. It hurt to be completely honest, it hurt a lot, but I guess there was no way around it. It was who I was. I still get it today, though it's not as bad as it was, it's still there.

The Doctor and Rose come and visit now and again. It's always nice to see them. Rose is always so kind and caring. She really cares about my well being. The Doctor I can tell still doesn't trust me, and I guess that's okay. He's warmed up to me a bit though. He may be still hesitate on certain things but he doesn't always glare at me anymore. Which is always nice.

I'm happy where I am though, and that's all that counts I suppose. My journey has made it's way here and I believe that's where it will end. I hope one day that when I'm long gone and out of the way, that someone might pick up this dairy and read it and think “I could be anything I want to be.” Or, “Just because I'm this, doesn't mean I can't be that.” or even, “If he can go through all this and be happy in the end, then so can I.” I just want to help someone out. I want them to be happy, just like me.