Fuck Love

1st Chapter

"Well I'm sorry for trying to do what I thought was best for you?" I shouted at the top of my lungs.
Everyone in the hallway could probably here me right now.

"Doing what's best for me? Are you being for real right now Dee?" I had no response for Jacques . So I just decided to let go of the whole conversation. The whole situation.
Let go of him.

"Oh now you just gone walk away huh? That's how you deal with your problems Diana right?"

I stopped,contemplating on giving him a piece of my mind. I continued walking. It wasn't going to be easy but I had to learn to live without that part of my life. And someway somehow I would find a way.

I felt a hand get ahold of mine. I already knew who it belonged to so I didn't bother looking back.
"I love you Dee."

"The fuck do you know about love?" I released my hand and went back to walking. Couldn't he realise that I was doing him a favour. Now he could go around with any girl without worrying about me. It hurt me to part ways but we were both getting too old for this.

*A week later*

I was walking with my science club members,when Jacque walked up to us,stopped Lauryn,who was walking on my right,and kissed her lustfully for the whole hallway to notice. For me to notice.

It stung,it really did. How could he do that to me? I know I broke up with him,but he didn't have to act like such an asshole. Jacques and I had dated for a year and a half,and I thought it was the pettiest thing for him to do things like this to spite me.
I had broken up with him,for his sake. He had been kicked out of the basketball team for reasons I still didn't know. He was failing dismally and I just didn't want to add more pressure on him by being needy and always being up in his space. The less pressure I put on him the better, if it meant him sleeping with every girl he wished just to ease his pain then so be it. At least then he wouldn't have to worry about me getting hurt by all of it.

I hadn't broken up with him because I hated him. No! Lord knows how much I love this guy. Love not loved.
But he was too blind to see that. They say you have to love them enough to let them go, I was just doing that.

I would have long walked away but everyone was gathered around to witness Grammy award winning stellar kiss. As Jac devoured my lab partner he made sure to spare me eye contact as a way to make me jealous. Typical of him.
I found my way through the crowd and as I was walking, he shouted," Oh I'm sorry did I hurt your feelings?"
I decided he wasn't worth talking to and commenced with my walk.

Poor Lauryn was just a victim in Jacques's experiment to see if I'll come crawling back to him. Yeah right, I might as well kill myself with a gun shot to the head.
But still it still hurt so bad.

Before I could comprehend who was walking behind me with quick footwork, I was pushed against the lockers and forced to face the one person I was trying to forget.

"Let go of me Jacque! Let go!" I struggled through his hold but he wouldn't budge.
Instead he looked into my eyes. Hazel eyes with a hint of gold seemed to look deep into my soul. Reading every secret I had sworn to take with me to the grave,understanding every bit of pain that flashed through every now and then.

"I'm not giving up on you Dee." If only he knew that I didn't want him to.

"Get the hell away from me!" My voice was barely whisper, not coming out as strong as I wanted it to.

He continued to stare intensely into my eyes.

"Is that what you want? Is that what you have really been wishing for, for the past week? "