Ashes (Sequel to Windows To The Soul)

Six.

I was walking fast; I didn’t want to be late the first day. After such a long weekend I was finally calmed down, I was going to have a routine and things to worry about that’d be much more important than Harry or Louis.

Yesterday I took my time to get familiarized with all the buildings and the campus, so I knew where I had to go and I didn’t had to bring a map with me.

Some people were heading to their classes; other people were talking with friends or sitting in benches losing their time.

I finally found my classroom and came in. It was almost empty, maybe I was early. I sat down in the first row.

“Hey.” Someone said.

It was Selena’s friend, the blond one, what was his name? Neil?

“Hey, Neil.” I said cheerfully turning to face him.

He laughed. “It’s Niall.” He corrected me.

“Oh, sorry. What a coincidence, I didn’t expect to see you here.” I smiled.

He grabbed his books and sat next to me.

We had a small talk until the professor showed up.

“Good morning, I’m Professor Hill.” The man said as he wrote his name on the whiteboard.

He was the typical college professor, white hair, old and a little bit angry with everyone.

After he explained who he was and the stuff he was going to be teaching us for the whole year he let us a have free day. That was awesome, I’d go look for a job, I really needed one.

I said goodbye to Niall and took a walk to the city. I put my headphones on and the world seemed to stop spinning, it freeze. I walking through the busy streets as the music made my mind go blank; there was nothing except the music.

I saw a banner that read that they needed someone to attend the shop. I walked in the small shop, it was empty. There was a boy reading a magazine behind the counter.

“Hello.” I said trying to capture his attention.

He didn’t take his eyes off of the magazine. I cleared my throat and he finally raised his head.

“What?” He barked.

That’s the way he treated his clients?

“I saw the banner-“I began.

“Oh, wait.” He cut me off.

He got up the chair and peeked through a door that was behind him. “Come here!” He yelled.

He sat on the chair and started reading the magazine again.

He was so young; he looked like he was twenty-something.

A short man walked through the door and approached me. “Kyle, why aren’t you attending her?!” He yelled at the boy.

They boy looked up from the magazine and sighed. “Because she’s here for the job.”

He rolled his eyes and focused on the magazine.

“Oh, that’s great! Come with me.” The old man said.

I followed him through the door and downstairs. There were a lot of paintings there.

“As you can see, we sell paintings. I need someone to attend the clients, because my son is completely useless.” He explained.

So the boy up there was his son, I could see the resemblance between them now. Brown eyes, brown hair, the same features.

“You look like a responsible young woman, let’s start the interview.” He said.

He sat behind a dusty table and I sat in front of him.

I got distracted by the beautiful paintings a few times, but that made him ask me if I knew something about the paintings that caught my eye.

We got up and he asked me about a few paintings. I was lucky he asked me about the ones I knew everything about. I loved paintings, and I loved to paint. I had to thank my mother; she taught me everything about the most famous paintings, the stories behind them and their authors.

I talked to him about my college schedule, and that I could only work Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and the weekend from nine to three, and thankfully he was good with that. I knew I wouldn’t be getting much money in that job, but it’d be enough.

He told me I had to be there tomorrow. I was so happy; I was starting to walk on the right path. I had a job and I was going to college, that’s all I needed, a routine to forget about the crazy things that happened to me a year ago, I needed something that’d keep my mind from thinking about Harry or Louis, or anything else that wasn’t important.

I walked out the shop and headed to my favourite bookstore, I needed something new to read.

This bookstore was a place that I loved, the smell, the books and the people there; I could live in one if it was possible.

I walked through the huge bookcases, looking for a good book, when one caught my eye.

The original version of Alice in Wonderland, what was it doing there? This book is really expensive, and only Louis had the original version, and it was at his house.

I took it out of the bookcase and flipped the pages, it was the original version, I had no doubt.

As I flipped the pages a paper fell from them to the floor. I took it up and started reading it.

Dear Taylor,

I don’t know if you will ever read this, I don’t even know if you will find this book, or if someone else will, but I need to let this out of me, because it’s killing me. Please, don’t throw this note away; you need to read what I have to say.

I’m so sorry, I’m sorry for hurting you, I’m sorry for using you, I’m sorry for everything that I’ve done to you.

I miss you, I know it’s crazy, but in the short period of time we spent together I felt good, I felt how the loneliness disappeared, I felt happy, genuinely happy, and I have to thank you for that. Now that you are gone, now that I now you will never run to my bed when you’re scared of storms, now that I will never be able to see how you blush every time I tell you how beautiful you are I’m hopeless. I’ve never been this desperate for someone, I’m craving for you, I don’t want anything or anyone else. I want you.

I broke you, I know. And believe me when I say that I’m paying for it, I’m paying the highest price- losing you.

Losing you has to be one of the worst things that have happened to me, because you took me with you the day you stepped in your mother’s car.

We’ve kissed twice, and I should’ve kissed you every second of every day you were there with me, I should’ve held you tight, I should’ve dropped out of the plan, I should’ve given you the love you need.

I know this note is selfish, because here I am, telling you how hurt I am when I’ve made you feel the same way. I know it’s selfish to ask you for a chance, but I want to fix you and I want you to fix me. Please, let me fix you. I will do anything.

Or at least, if you don’t want me, give me my soul back, give me my body back and give me my heart back. It’s not fair that you have me and I don’t have you. But if you don’t want to give me everything back, take care of everything for me, please.

L.

I realized that the tears that were staining the sheet weren’t mine, they were his… Which made me feel horrible. After reading the note I got out the bookstore, I know I was leaving with Louis’ book, but it was his.

I knew if I ran to meet him, I’d forgive him, and I didn’t want to do it… So instead I ran back to college, I wanted to cry in my room, alone. 

A/N: Hi guys! First of all, I'm sorry this chapter is sooooo short, but I feel like it's better this way. Second, I'm sorry I didn't update yesterday, Internet wasn't working. I'll try to double update today! Third, I imagine Francisco Lachowski as Kyle;)