Fix Me Please

Chapter 28

Gerard's P.O.V

I woke up in a long white tunnel. I couldn't see the end of it but I knew it was very long.

I was starting to wonder what happened but then I remembered the needle.

I had tried to kill myself.

" Is this heaven?" I ask out loud

" Oh no you're still far away." Someone behind me says

I turn and see a girl in white. She looked about fourteen and had wild red hair.

She was dressed all in white and it contrasted really well with her bright red hair.

" Who are you?" I ask

" I'm Delia. One of the fallen young ones. Like you I killed myself." Delia says

" Why would you do that?" I ask

" I hated all the pain the world caused me." Delia says

" So what's on the other side of the tunnel?" I ask

" Why heaven of course." Delia says

She starts walking.

" Wait where are you going ?" I ask

" You'll have to make the journey on your own if you wish to leave." Delia says

Then she disappears.

Great. Now I'm all alone.

I start to walk and as soon as I do flashes of my life project on the walls.

There's me and Mikey playing. Oh poor Mikey I'm sorry to have put him through this.

I stop and watch until the screen goes dark.

There's nothing left for me to live for. I've lost Alyssa and she won't talk to me.

The next memory was projected on the other side. It was of me and the guys.

All our old interviews. They were always in the back of my mind. There was all of us smiling.

We were joking and acting normal. Well I was almost normal.

My life was broken but now it's done. Well now I have to get to the end of the tunnel.

I keep walking and watch the memories unfold from the depths of my mind.

I stop at one particular memory .

It was of Alyssa's first night when we had a mini pizza fight.

I didn't know how much she would affect me until very recently.

The guys knew. They knew all along it just took me longer to realize.

She was amazing and she deserves someone better. Someone she could have forever.

I just realized something. I had forgotten that in my note I told her that I love her.

I used the L word . But it's true . I love her as much as any guy could love a girl.

She makes me feel like I'm in a totally different world. One full of happiness.

Gosh Gerard. Face it you're never going to see her again.

Even if I did make it through this she'll never want to see me anyway. She hates me.

I wouldn't blame her I hurt her. Badly too.

I just realized I had fall to my knees and I was crying.

" Is this what you wanted? For me to suffer. Well I'm suffering!" I say while crying.