Seperate, but together

Hey guys, this is a poem/letter I wrote for my sister Leah when she moved away to university, we are crazily close and it is just my raw feelings and emotions.

 You may see remnants of yourself in these words, if you have ever felt grieved because someone you loved has gone away.

 I hope you like it and please tell me what you think :)

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Separate but together

Two halves of a whole

So different, but alike.

I know your shining mind better than the dark corners of my own.

Forever a unit, ‘the girls’ they would call us

Always side by side

Our bright eyed and rosy cheeked cousin, to this day, gets our names confused

Although she now knows her A B C’s

But loves us still

As one.

The last borne

I was under constant care

From your maternal instinct, I as am high maintenance and fragile

 I dread the day

When I am replaced by your own beautiful heir.

Some think us twins, though couldn’t be more contrasting physically

And I relish in the knowledge that I stand taller

Despite the 22 month gap.

When you are gone I am cold

And introverted

I seal my deepest emotions in an airtight bag

Devoid of oxygen, they beg for release, that only you seem to supply

How can I function with only half of myself?

I cannot walk with only 1 leg

With only 1 arm I can’t grasp you tight, in the fleeting embrace I long for.

When speaking of love,

I can’t fail to mention the other side

The ear splitting disputes and recurring quarrels

Which I must remember to commend our parents

 For such tolerance

 And for not resorting to harsh measures of punishment

As the teenage hormones are unyielding and insolent curses of any household.

With only each other, we learned to adapt

With two

Mum and dad gushed love and support

And we are in everlasting gratitude and devotion for them

But it’s not the same

With people so far from your own age

They are the finest parents, which is more than they’re supposed to be

But you are my confidant, my sister, my best friend

Best friends seems such a meek term

And we are not only blood,

So I wish for a more appropriate and perfect label

For what we are

But there is none.

You have largely aided in sculpting me into who I am now

And who I’m going to become

And I’m grateful for every single thing.

I pray all the time, thanking god for you. And I won’t even try to explain all you do for me

Because it’s an infinite number.

Regarding this rapidly approaching and long separation

Things may never be the same again, who knows?

But life must run its course

And you need to take this giant’s step

Because this is the path you have chosen to take, this is what you aspire to do

And so I will endure

For you

And also for myself

Because I have to recognise the power of change

And learn to accept it

I shall try to fill the void that will form without you with many things

Friends, family, work and studies

I will try to think of other things,

Except our separation

But you will be a constant thought fluttering round my consciousness

Yes, we will still see each other

At holidays and visits

And through letters, photos, calls, texts and Skype

So you won’t really be gone,

 Not really

And yet, why do I feel like this is the end?

“The end of an era, you might say”

More than that

For some siblings, this won’t be such a big deal, a change, but not like this

They aren’t that close

Not like us.

I’ve been building and building this up in my head

So it seems like more than it is

Like a vast thunderstorm is about to open up

And hail down

This is me, trying to begin to explain just how much I will notice your absence

In short, I will miss you

I don’t think I need to continue because you understand

Just how much.

And I believe I shall ramble on even more, like a certain monk, if I don’t bring this letter/poem to a close soon

I will speak to and see you shortly, I assume

So, farewell for now, to this period of my life

 And to you-

My counterpart

And my blessing from god

Never fear, whatever happens

we shall always be us

‘The girls’

Leah and Hope.