Memoirs of A Queen

Phase 6, No one's humble

A younger Daley in the mm.

Daley Blessing

It's always been just me, by myself.

Though I was surrounded by everyone I've always felt alone and cold, drowning in my ways. Though I was the odd ball, I was expected to be a certain way.

Before mother died and left me here in this world full of people that try to hurt you every chance they get, she expected me to act, dress, eat, and sleep a certain way. She was harder on me than any of my other siblings. They got to go to the city, go out with friends, get C's and D's in school, the whole nine y'know?They ran a muck in their stomping grounds; Mobile, Alabama.

It was only when she died, when a heartless being took her away from me, that I became savage like.

When she passed, I turned into a slob. Despite being from the projects, I had a large amount of clothing. Y'know, like to much for my own self. But, after mama died, I refused to wear any of them clothes. If I could've I would've went into the streets like the madwomen I felt I was inside, with no clothes just as naked as the day I was born, free of the cotton, silk, and polyester.

I opened my eyes slowly. Here I stood, in front of a long mirror in the corner of my old bedroom. I opened my mouth and gasped, this exposed the gap in my teeth that I had gained from papa. I slapped my hand to my mouth. My eyes were wide as if I was in awe, I never thought I'd see this girl again. Her, being me.

I stood at 4'5 on my polished black church shoes, I tilted my foot to examine them. They were my favorite pair. I rubbed my feet into the wooden floor of our bedroom. It wasn't the type of wood you're thinking about. It was like the wood that you'd see on your neighbor's front porch.

Laughter and giggling caused me to snap my head up, causing me to shield my burning eyes from the rays of the roasting sun coming through the window. I turned around quickly, following the sweet guffaw that had filled my sensitive ears.

As I walked, my lips tightened because of the suspense that I felt. I wanted to know who was laughing and why. It sounded like Odessa and Reign, my sister and brother. I hadn't seen them in forever. I may have even forget how what they look like. I felt uneasy, the memories of them was fuzzy.

I passed through the hallway that was oh-so familiar to me. Old wallpaper hung down from the walls, a product of the lack of glue. Mama had tried many times to fix that wall, but nothing ever worked. The apartment was older than the statue of liberty, I bet.

Peeking into every room that I passed, I realized that I was coming up short. Mama and 'nem room, empty. The room that I shared with the other kids, empty. I even checked the rest of the small apartment, it too was empty.

No furniture. No people. No nothing.

My innocent eyes watered with salty tears. Dropping to my knees, my nose twitched at the foul smell that came from under my dress. It was the same dress that I wore at my mama's homecoming ceremony at the church, some time after she had passed. I knew I hadn't showered for days, ... maybe even a week. That explained my beautiful but filthy clothing. "I'm waiting for mama to come back, we always take a warm bath togetha" I'd try to convince myself and others.

I knew mama was never coming back. I knew that she was deep underground.

Pulling me out of my crying fit, I heard the tee-hee-heeing again. It had came from outside this time. I dashed out the door, shuffled down the hallway that smelled as bad as myself and that harbored ruckus, and skipped down the cracking steps of our building.