Delitrium | Jungkook

「Chapter One」

Delitrium:
The dizzying euphoria you get from inhaling just a bit too much of that "new book" smell.

●

*beep*beep*beep*

I wearily opened my eyes to see my alarm beeping frantically. Rubbing my eyes, I woke up slowly.

"6:00 a.m" Showed the face of my digital alarm clock.

Waking up to my alarm was something I had always hated, but for once today, it was different.
I was moving away. Moving away from the hustle and bustle of Seoul. Moving away from the noise, moving away from the painful memories.

I heard footsteps coming towards my room and seconds later, my dad peeked into my room. He was about to shout his lungs out like every other day but was a little taken aback when he saw me grinning at him.

Grinning back at me he said, "What a lovely surprise early in the morning!" Exaggerating a bit too much, earning a gagging sound from me.

I gestured him to come and sit beside me.
"Excited?" He asked, ruffling my hair.
"Pretty much," I said looking at him.

"Thats what mom would've wanted right?"

He gave me a somewhat sad smile and told me to get ready and come down for breakfast. I bit my lip just regretting a little bit for saying that.

Dad, mom and me. A one small happy family.
But that was before she was diagnosed with an incurable disease.

I was in Junior High then.
If the sight of my mother always bedridden and weak disheartened me so much, I wonder how my dad felt. They loved eachother so much and my dad tried to do everything that he could.

On the outside we never seemed to lose hope. I'd go straight to the hospital after school was over and told my mom everything that had happened. What we were taught that day, the childish jokes that were said in class.

My mom used to listen to all of them intently and laugh and smile with all the energy she could muster.
My dad used to arrive at just that moment and would silently take a picture. Something we'd treasure forever.
I'd read my favourite books out loudly to her and if she wasn't feeling too weak, she'd read some stories to me too.

And that was the only time we could escape from reality, lost in the world of fairies, princes and princesses, witches and wizards.

Where there was always a happy ending.

Unlike our story.

We'd smile and laugh, but deep down all three of us knew that her death was something inevitable.

She died after a year. He death had been a peaceful one, as she died in her sleep.
And just like that, she was gone.

But then life has to go on too, right? Even after her death we still lived in the same house because we just couldn't let go of her yet.
I went to school as usual and dad went to work as always.

We'd catch up on the weekends and he would take me out, buy me stuff.
We'd do everything together and my dad used to work hard to make up for the empty space entitled 'mom'.

And now finally, dad had made this difficult decision to move, to hopefully start over.

Running my hand through my short hair, I dragged all my luggage carefully downstairs which mostly consisted of the various novels I had read and collected over time.

The smell of delicious pancakes wafted towards me as I quickly made my way into the kitchen.

"Today I've made you an extra delicious breakfast, miss," My dad said with an extra nasal tone to his voice. I giggled and we ate our breakfast together. Somehow I felt so much lighter today, like a weight being lifted off me.

Soon we got everything cleaned up and were ready to go.
I looked at our family photo one last time before putting it inside my bag.

My dad was waiting for me in the car patiently smiling all the while.

"Ready?" He asked.
I nodded my head intently.

●

The harbour was so crowded that I thought for a moment that I'd get lost.
My dad held me tightly as we showed out tickets and made our way inside the ship. I heaved a sign of relief as we sat down.

So we were on sea, away from the landmass, away from the thousand memories.

Song Yeseul, you can do this!

I told myself mentally.

"You have to."
Said the voice.

I nodded and took a deep breath.

Off to Jeju Island!