Act Like You Love Me (Shawn Mendes Fanfic)

Chapter 26 Act Like You Love Me

Chapter 26 Shawn's POV
I sat in my studio with a paper sitting right in front of me and a pencil just starring at me. I couldn't think of what to write. Usually when I'm down I immediately escape to music. But this time nothing was working for me. I couldn't stop thinking about Ainsley. The look on her face when she told me I had to go. Man. The amount of pain I have put her through. I completely messed it up. I never thought in a million years I would have ever loved a girl the way I loved her. Me meeting her was an accident. My goal was to not create any relationships with someone special because I was going to have to leave them. But I amazingly failed at my own task. I heard a knock on the door and saw Zak. I looked at him and then looked back at my paper.
"How you doin man?" He pulled a chair right next to me and patted my back.
"You know liven the dream." I commented.
"Yeah." He laughed.
"Seriously man how are you doing?" He asked once again.
I shook my head in disappointment and I could feel tears beginning to develop.
"I'm terrible. I really am." I put my hands over my face as I could feel Zak give me a side hug.
"Ainsley told me to tell you that her grandpas funeral is Monday." Zak explained.
"No. He didn't make it?" He shook his head.
"Dam it!" I slammed my fist on the table.
"I'm sorry it's my fault." Zak added. I didn't respond. I didn't want to respond to that comment.
"All I wanted was to leave and go onto my tour happy, but I feel like that is like impossible now." I took a deep breathe.
"I'm just sitting here, and I'm trying to write a new song to surprise my fans and I can't! I have nothing coming in my head. Absolutely nothing. Nothing meaningful, powerful, everything is just useless." I complained. I laid my head on the desk and just felt nothing but empty. I slowly lifted my head up and looked at Zak in the eyes.
"You wanna know what I can't get outta my head?" I said.
"What?" He asked.
"When Ainsley told me did I act like I loved her." I looked up.
"Man. That hurt a lot."
"She didn't mean it Shawn she was angry." I interrupted Zak.
"Wait!" He froze.
"I have an idea."
"And that is?" He asked.
"Hand me my guitar please?" Zak got up and handed me my beautiful instrument.

It was Monday morning and I put fixed up my black tie. It's been a couple of days since Ainsley and I have talked. I have been miserable, and what's even worst I don't even know how she's doing. I know she's a hot mess, and to top that off I made it worst. This is probably the first time I have ever messed something up so bad. I leave Wednesday on my tour, and I can't help to think that time isn't being my friend. It just wasn't on my side. I felt the time I had here just wasn't enough for me. I just want to tell Ainsley come with me. Come on tour, but I can't. She has her own life to live, and I am beginning to believe I'm going to make it worst for her. That's kills me so much. I walked into my bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. I put my head down and thought about a moment Ainsley and I had.
We both were in my studio and I was showing her everything. I showed her my awards and how my songs stitches and life of the party went platinum for me. I remember her eyes lightening up and she was thrilled, but I also remembered my life over hers. How we were completely different and we each had different stories. She grabbed my guitar and began strumming it crazily. I laughed at her watching her having fun. I went behind her and grabbed her and spun her around a couple of times. We both were laughing. We each couldn't stop. I finally stopped because I was getting dizzy, but all I could see was her smile. Her beautiful smile that gave me butterflies.
Then I snapped out of it. Everything happened so fast, but I honestly believe it was for a reason. What was it? I don't know, but it was all worth it in the end. My life and the time I spent with her were one of the best memories I have ever encountered. Better yet, I was able to see that there was more than just music in my life. I realized that I wouldn't be alone with her, that she wasn't just my imagination, I didn't have to leave her with an aftertaste. Everything I wrote in my life I didn't have to experience through her. I have to leave on tour tomorrow, and this is a time where I'm not happy to leave. I wanted to leave on a high note going into it like yeah I got this, but the truth is I absolutely don't.