x
2015
xxx
xxxx
xxxxx
xxxxxx
It was that one winter. I was always excited whenever winter came. I mean, who doesn't love snow? But there was one thing that made me hate winter.
That guy, Lee Chan.
Our twenty-third monthsary came. Almost two years together huh? At first I was confused. Lee Chan liked surprises. He always did lots of unexpected things during events like this. From pranks, accidents, gifts to the point that it doesn't even surprise me much anymore.
But today was different.
Today, he didn't call me at all. Today, he didn't say any good mornings. Today, there wasn't any blowing kisses.
But today was utter silence.
I thought it would be another joke or prank to surprise me. So I waited and waited. I sat in my bed, thinking of what could Chan be planning.
Chan was like that, as a boyfriend. He always made his girl happy no matter what. He can't stand fights. He liked thinking of ways to make me happy, he said.
So why was he so silent today? It was unusual. I was starting to get worried about him. Pacing around my room, thinking of what might have happened to my Chan.
Until my phone ringed. I shot up and immediately grabbed my phone, tapping the message notification.
"Song Joo, let's meet."
I was scared. He rarely calls me by my name which means something's up. But part of me still believed that it was just his usual prank for our monthsary.
"Sure. Where and when?"
My mind was becoming a big mess. What if he was serious? What if he's going to break up with me?
I don't think I could ever survive if he leaves me. I love him too much.
"Usual meeting, 7."
He sounds so serious. This is totally not okay. Usual meeting means the park. That's where we used to hang-out after school, doing home works, comparing answers.
Oh how I missed those moments.
The walk to the park was silent. I was deep in my thoughts. Of course, the thought of him leaving me never left my mind. I'm scared of the thought.
My thoughts were snapped when I saw my boyfriend standing at our usual spot. I called out for his name and we locked eyes.
I waited for the usual blowing kiss routine. But there was none.
So I grumpily walked to him and greeted with a "Happy Monthsary, Duckling." I didn't meet his eyes since I tried acting sad. For the first time, he broke the rule of blowing a kiss whenever we see each other.
And I died a little.
He poked my shoulder, motioning me to look at him in the eyes.
And when I did, I regretted it.
There was no emotion on his face. My heart was thumping so hard. I was scared. I really was.
"Uhm..yeah?" I stuttered.
"Yoon Song Joo." He said those words so clearly, my heart never fails to drop a bit.
"Let's..." He trailed off.
I knew what he was going to say. I don't want to hear those words. Never ever.
I covered his lips with my finger. "Whatever you're going to say, please stop."
Tears were threatening to fall from my eyes. I looked at his orbs and saw regret. I didn't know why he was doing this.
He helplessly removed my hands from his lips but I started punching his chest.
"Why?"
No answer.
"I'm asking you why you wanted to do it?"
No answer.
"What have I done wrong huh?"
He wasn't answering any of my questions. I was punching so hard now.
"I don't love you anymore."
Those words echoed through my brain. His words were etched right through my hear with anger and guilt.
"I don't understand."
I held into his arms tightly, not wanting to let him go. He was my love and my life. I wouldn't dare to let him go.
"I'm sorry."
He tried to untangle my arms off him. But I wasn't planning on letting him go soon.
"Tell me this is just some prank right? This is a joke? Happy Monthsary baby! You've succeeded in making me cry!" I tried sounding cheerful but my voice betrays me at it cracks halfway.
"No. We are done." His voice was so cold, like it had no emotion at all.
"Please, just give me one more chance. I'm sorry but please don't leave me."
I didn't know what I was apologizing for. All I knew was I had to get him back.
He untangled my fingers that were wrapped in between his. And slowly drifted away leaving me alone in this cold snowy evening.
I was torn. I watched as his figure disappeared. Soon, he was only a dot.
And I'm still here, crying my heart out in the middle of the streets. I couldn't feel anything.
I thought I was your happiness?
I thought my happiness was your priority?
I thought us was the best thing that has ever happened to your life?
Were those just empty promises? It can't be. I saw the love through your eyes when you told me you loved me.
I covered my face with my palms and started sobbing harder. His words replayed in my mind and I hated it. I hated it so much.
What a harsh reality, my heart said.
