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regrets.
It was all that is left.
Regrets, Guilt, Anger, Confusion... Everything sounded wrong.
If I didn't say 'hello' when I first laid my eyes on him, then I could've been better now, right?
If I didn't say 'hello' every morning to him as I go out my front porch, then I wouldn't be experiencing this pain, right?
If I regret all our memories together then I could've moved on already, right?
But I didn't.
I never regret any of those moments we spent together. To me, it was the best moments of my life.
The times I spent with Lee Chan, my first love.
But now, he's gone like a bubble. I never knew his reasons. I hated how he just left me like that, hanging in mid-air.
Maybe he really meant it when he said "Love is in the air."
Literally.
I still remember how we spent nights on my rooftop, bickering over which star was hotter and colder—the red or blue ones?
We were giggling as we count the stars twinkling above us, without any idea of our existence.
"To me, you are the prettiest star, though."
I remember you suddenly blurting out those words, immediately cupping your mouth with the realization of what you just said.
It was one of the most romantic and memorable words I've heard from you.
I stifled a laugh and intertwined my hands with yours. It felt so nice. Being up there and spending time with you. Just as simple as that.
Did you remember? When you told me stories about the stars. We even named each stars by our memories. Like how we named the biggest star amazing because that's how you confessed to me.
You looked right through my eyes and uttered some "Yoon Song Joo, I love you sooo much."
It always made my heart skip a beat.
But now, all those stars lead to nothing but memories. Memories of our love. I laugh bitterly as I say 'hello' to some of the stars I recall. From star amazing to star annoying.
Oh, how I missed this.
Now, I look at the scattered scenery of the sky. I smile at all the memories, like it was laid out. All of our memories together from the moment I met him. Our chapters in each other's life.
I realized that not all things always go on your way just because it was good before. Things change. Maybe it's time to let go. Time to move on.
And forget him.
I regret nothing except for one thing.
I wish I never said my hello to him.
xx
