Hope of the white star

Chapter 4

This morning I opened my eyes in a place I have never seen before, Everything was a pale yellowish gold and they looked like clouds.  There was a woman with me  she was tall and slim with an apron that looked quite familiar.  Then I realized it was my mother.  She was like I had never seen her before.  Instead of the long curly hair I always remembered, she now had short brown hair like mine and curls that framed her beautiful but tired looking face, her eyes were bright and full of life, she started walking toward me, I did the same and then we were running when we met she hugged me and whispered "I will love you always."  I closed my eyes and whispered back "I'll love you most of all." when I opened them she was gone and I was all alone, she disappeared.  I opened my eyes again but this time I was in my room.  I sat straight up and stared at the wall trying to comprehend what had just happened.

    I tossed and turned all night thinking about my dream.  The night crept away slowly and as soon as the sun came up I was out of my room and heading over to check on my brothers and sisters.  Maxtion and Maria were up so I took them downstairs to get something to eat.  Daniel was already downstairs and had breakfast made for everyone.  "Just what you wanted Janie, breakfast for everyone, eggs, toast, and jam." Nation and Maria looked upon the feast delighted that they could have such a treat but I showed no expression.  "Will you please forgive me now?" Daniel asked "Janie?Are you alright?"
"Yes.  Um...Th-Thank you Daniel.  I forgive you for yelling."
"Janie are you alright?  You look tired." I wasnt alright.  I was thinking about my dream and I was exahusted from staying up most of the night but I wasnt about to open up to Daniel about it, it was to soon and I was still upset.  "Daniel I'm fine." I mumbled as I walked across the kitchen to make me and my sister's a plate of food.  When they finished Maxtion started talking endlessly.  "Today is April 15, 1912 and Mama is coming back April 20, 1912." she sat in her chair smiling and waiting for praise "Um... Great job Maxtion...for remembering that!" Daniel said through a mouthful of food.  "No" Maria kneeled on her chair " Mama comes back April 18, 1912!" Maxtion kneeled on her chair now as well and leaned over to Maria "No she doesn't she comes back April 20, 1912 on the Titanic and they drop her at pier... um...Janie what pier?"

"pier 59."

"Pier 59!"

"No Mama comes back April 18, 1912 on Carpathia, pier 34!"
"Maria no she doesn't" my voice shook as I has about to burst into tears and my little sister looked at me with pain in her eyes.  She just stared at me ,then Maxtion, then Daniel.  She bolted from her chair and up the stairs almost knocking over Ms. Bauschinger, who was holding William,  and James who was walking a few stairs after her.

"Well, that went well" Daniel said without really meaning it of course.  Laobaoise said something in German as she got to the bottom of the stairs and put William in his seat to make him breakfast. "Mrs. Baushinger you can have eggs, toast, and jam if you would like." She looked up and smiled at me. "Thank you Janie." she said in her thick accent and continued to make William's breakfast. " Thank you for the breakfast Daniel it was very kind of you." I look at Maxtion hoping she would practice her manners and say something when she realized I was staring. "Thank you Daniel". "You're welcome girls." Daniel looks around the room. " Where's John?" He asked. I scenced worry in his voice and wondered the same. Where was my Papa? Then Mrs. B piped in from a distance. "He checking shops. Be back soon." Daniel's worry turned to relief when he heard Mrs. B's broken sentence.

Not long after we finished off breakfast the front door opened and someone walked in. I felt a great relief when I seen my Papa appear from behind the staircase. He had a strange smirk on his face like I've never seen before. He walked to the table and put down a newspaper then proceed to take off his suit jacket. "Good morning Maxtion, Daniel, Janie, James, and Willy of course!" Daniel walked over to him and his expression turned back to worry. I don't understand it. Daniel looks at me and then back at my father and attempts to sit him in a chair. "Good morning to you too, sir. Are you feeling alright? I made breakfast it you're hungry." Papa's smile got even bigger as he said "That's splendid! Thank you Daniel." He frantically waved around a newspaper as he spoke. Papa tried to stand up but Daniel pushed him back into his seat. " I'll get it." Daniel said through his teeth.

What's wrong with Papa that Daniel is being so protective over, I wonder to myself. "Where is Maria?" Papa looked frantically around the room "She got a little upset this morning and ran to her room. I thought maybe we should just give her her space." Daniel looked my father in the eye with that worried look still on his face. "Yes, yes that's quite alright I would have wanted you to do that." Papa put the paper down on the table when Daniel brought over his food. I quickly snatched the paper away flipped it around and looked at the headlines. Suddenly my Daniel's worried expression and my father's drunken appearance all made sense. I couldn't speak all I could do was read and re-read the headlines as my whole world began crashing down. "15 April 1912. NEW LINER TITANIC HITS ICEBERG; SINKING BY THE BOW AT MIDNIGHT, WOMEN PUT OFF IN LIFEBOATS; LAST WIRELESS AT 12:27 A.M. BLURRED."