Carefully Crazy {On Hold}

Chapter Seven

“Are you going to movie night tonight in the lounge?” Hazelle is sitting on the floor, with pieces of foil sticking up all in her hair. Her meeting with Kiv’s parents earlier today went ‘fabulously’, so in celebration she decided to dye her hair the same shade of orangish-red as Kiv’s tips. She throws me a sideways glance, and all I can do is shrug as a reply to her question.

“I don’t know.” I was contemplating just hitting the ole sack early.” I fake a yawn, hoping to convince her. I haven’t told her just how bad today went, or Carol’s offer at the very end.

“Oh, come on Cammie! Live a little! Plus, they’re providing a Chick-Fil-A buffet, and I know how much you love their ice cream.” She’s trying her best, even hitting me with her puppy dog eyes. My heart tugs at the thought of a fun movie night with friends and Chick-Fil-A; but the other side is just waiting for me to fuck up. Again.

“Haz...” My voice trails off, and Haz can hear the slight desire in it.

“It’s our, or your last free night! You start school tomorrow, and then it will all go downhill from there. No more movie nights with carefree banter. C’mon, it’s your last hurrah of the summer.” She leans her bony elbows on my bed frame, and stares. Stares until it gets uncomfortable.

I know that she’s right; it’s the last hurrah for quite a few of us here. The last hurrah of the ones that got approved to start attending school tomorrow. Shae and I were included in the bunch, our mental stability ‘okay enough’ for it. She can see the gears in my head turning, and her facial expression goes from pleading to hopeful.

“Fine.” I give in, tucking my knees under my chin. She squeals excitedly, giving my arm a quick squeeze of happiness.

“Yay!” She squeals, jumping onto my bed next to me. “This is going to be great, and Shae’ll be happy that you’re going as well.” There’s something in her voice that I don’t quite catch when she mentions Shae. It almost sounds like some sort of hint. But, before I can think more of it, my cynical mind has to put in its own input with a Why in the hell would a guy like him like a girl like you?

“I guess so.” Shrugging, I get up and make my way to the bathroom, abandoning Haz on my bed, her eyes following my retreating back.

Shutting the wooden door behind me, I face myself in the mirror, hands gripping each side of the sink, my knuckles white from the strength put into the action.

“Could you be any more foolish?” She’s right behind me and I jump, startled at her sudden presence.

“Mom?” It’s her before me, but unlike the other times, she isn’t in blood soaked clothes. As a matter of fact, she looks sort of...normal; or as normal as my memory can recall her being.

“Yeah Camber, it’s me. God, I hate all those nicknames your little friends give you.” Her voice is more cynical than normal, her face contorted into a show of disgust.

“Oh... I didn’t know, I’m sorry.” What is this, my mommy from hell? The punishment mommy never got to give me?

“That’s not why I’m here though, I’m here to tell you that this isn’t the place you you. These aren’t the people you need to be around.” Her eyes go kinder, and in the mirror I can see her perfectly manicured, transparent hand resting right above my shoulder.

“What do you mean? I’m getting better here mom. These people accept me for me. No matter how messed up I am.” I search for her eyes that are so much like my own for any sign of sympathy, or at least understanding; but no, all her eyes are are empty. A chill runs down my spine, and instinctively, I shy away from her image.