Not A Weapon

Chapter Eight - Progress

I walked back inside the room with two trays of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, jam, and butter, and two bottles of water. I hadn't had proper food for breakfast like this in ages, and I'm assuming the Winter Soldier was not served 5 star meals wherever he was too. "Breakfast!" I singsonged as I shut the door behind me. Bucky looked at me from his usual spot. Apparently he moved since I left him to get something to eat. "You like bacon and eggs?" I asked. He kept staring at me, not answering. I huffed and put the two trays on a foldable table, which I began dragging towards the bed.

"I don't- remember..." He answered, surprising me. 

I smiled at him warmly. "Well, let's find out, shall we." He nodded minutely and I sat down next to him, the table now in front of us. I picked up my fork and ate a few bites, watching him out of the corner of my eye. After a few moments, he picked up his own fork, and had a bite. After swallowing, he immediately began eating more, a lot faster, making me giggle. "Calm down, the food's not gonna run away." I said, jokingly. He slowed down, but I knew he must've been really hungry. I smiled. "So you like it?" I asked. He nodded. 

"Thank you." He muttered, making my smile widen. 

"No problem."

We finished eating and I stacked the trays on each other and pushed them through a slot that went to the other side for someone to pick up. "So, can we talk now?" I asked. 

"About what?" He asked, his face expressionless. 

"Do you remember anything?" He didn't answer. 

"Come on, we were just making progress-" 

"Progress? For what?" He interrupted. I ran my hands through my hair. 

"If I answer that, you have to answer a question for me, okay? One question for you, one question for me. Sound good?" 

"Fine."

"Alright. Good... Progress," I sat back down next to him. "I'm trying to help you get your memories back, and to get you back to normal, to the sarcastic, friendly Bucky I've heard so much about." I told him, cautious about his reaction. 

"That man from the bridge, the soldier- he- he knew me?" He asked, looking at me curiously with his blue eyes, with a hint of sea green, that seemed to glow. I nodded. 

"Now that was two questions, so now I get two." I smiled, and he nodded in response.

"Okay, I'm sorry I know it's touchy, but I have to ask this... Do you remember anything, from HYDRA?" I had to know, and I needed to know what it was to help him. His expression immediately closed up, and if I didn't have my powers, I would not be able to tell what he was feeling. But I did know. He was feeling afraid. I suppose, of punishment, if he told us about HYDRA.

"I remember- they made me kill people... and if- if I didn't, then I'd be in trouble, and they would wipe me." 

"Wipe you?" I remembered that from his nightmare.

"Take- take away my memories again, of the time I was awake, and it was so painful-" He cut off and I didn't press him for more.

I knew what he meant by 'when I was awake'. I had heard that he was put to cryogenic sleep when he wasn't needed for any assassinations or anything. "I'm sorry" I said quietly. "For what?" He asked, surprised. "For what you've been through. I know, it wasn't me or anything, it's just, people say they're sorry, when they want to let you know they feel sympathetic with you. I don't really mean it like that, I kind of mean it like, I'm here for you. Okay?"

As I suspected, he didn't speak, just nodded again. "Well, good." I smiled at him. 

"I know- I know that I'm being watched..." He said, taking me by surprise. "I – I see the cameras moving to watch me." I regained my composure. 

"Yeah, but they're just trying to help you Bucky" I told him. He didn't say anything else, but I knew he meant something by telling me. It was his way of saying that he was uncomfortable with being watched, and that he knew he wasn't getting any better while under surveillance.

-+-+-+-+-+-

"No. No way. Not happening." Was the first thing Tony said in response to my request, which I made after explaining what I thought about Bucky being uncomfortable here. And it was obvious and made sense. Of course he was uncomfortable while knowing that there were people watching him 24/7. I mean, all I had to do was imagine how I would feel if someone was watching me while I was having a nightmare.

"Tony, seriously, if we want him to get better, this has to happen." I argued. "And I'm trained, I know what to do to protect myself." 

"He's a super soldier, with a metal arm." He snapped. I rolled my eyes. Why he felt like he had some sort of responsibility to protect me, I had no idea. 

"I think we should let her do it. And JARVIS would warn us if anything happened, right?" Tony nodded at Steve with a set jaw. "Then, I think it's okay." Steve said. 

"Thank you." I said.

Tony shook his head. "Fine. But if something happens, I will say 'I told you so.'" 

"We know." I said, smiling slightly, knowing I had won. Steve smiled at me thankfully, knowing the risk that I was gonna take by doing this. 

"And if you die on me or something, I'll kill you" Tony threatened. 

"Don't worry" I grinned and reassured him. "I'll be fine, besides my house is right here in the city".

I knew how dangerous this could be, and to be honest, I wasn't just doing this for Steve, and because he asked me to, I was partially doing this because I had sort of grown attached to Bucky, and I wanted to help him get better. So I was completely willing to take the risk, and not just for Steve... 

"I want hourly updates." Tony told me, pulling me out of my thoughts. I nodded. "I'll see you for dinner every day." 

"I feel the love." Was my only response before I turned around and started walking towards the exit. 

"Where are you going?" 

"To clean!"