Not A Weapon

Chapter Six- No More Missions

I ran my hands through my hair as I quickly walked to Bucky's room. Tony called me and told me to get here quick. "What?" I asked as I got to Steve and Tony, who were standing outside the room, looking into the glass again. 

"He fell asleep" Steve said quietly. I grinned. 

"Really? That's great! Why did you sound like the world was ending then?" I asked Tony with a raised eyebrow. He said nothing and pulled up a holographic screen.

"Watch this" He muttered. He played a video, it was of Bucky, in the room. He was in the same position, just a little farther on the bed, his back on the wall. I smiled as I watched him close his eyes and his breathing deepen. Then he started fidgeting and squirming, soon he was hyperventilating then shot up, back straight, eyes wide open and started screaming.

I felt my hand clamp over my mouth as he gripped his hair, screaming louder and louder, then stopped suddenly. His jaw clenched and his hands went to his sides tightly, his muscles bulging. His eyes were wide open and I could see the terror in them. He didn't move, but his eyes slowly dulled, his arms remaining firmly by his sides, jaw still clenched tightly.

Tony turned it off and I removed my hand from my mouth slowly. "He needs intensive help doesn't he...?" Steve asked softly. I turned to him and nodded, hugging him. I knew how much this hurt him. He sighed, probably guessing what was on my mind. "I'm fine. He's the one who needs help." He said. I nodded.

"Tony, call my work and tell them I'm on a project and need to have someone take over for my patients until further notice. Please and thank you" I handed my phone to him as he nodded. 

"Sure thing" I took a deep breath and walked into the room.

Bucky was sitting there, arms still strained by his sides. He didn't notice me enter so I walked closer before talking "Hey" I said quietly. He made no movement to acknowledge my presence. "I'm Alex, remember?" I asked quietly. No reaction. I walked a little closer and crouched in front of him, his eyes finally focusing on me. "How are you feeling Bucky?" I asked.

Nothing. I reached out for his real shoulder, trying to ignore the amount of fear I was getting from him. He was terrified. He flinched as my fingers made contact with his shoulder, but it came and went in a split second, barely enough time for me to register it. "What is the Asset's mission?" He asked, voice hoarse. I took my hand back, letting it drop by my side.

"You, Bucky, are done being the Asset. No more missions. No more pain. No more killing. No more doctors-" 

"What are you then?" He asked suddenly. I was surprised he asked anything. 

"I-I'm just a person, like you." 

"No not like the Asset. The asset is a weapon. The asset does as it's commanded. The asset works for HYDRA. The Asset does as it's commanded-" He gripped his hair suddenly, hunching over and squeezing his eyes shut. I touched his shoulder again, trying to understand what was going on.

Bucky was hanging onto the edge, reaching for Steve's hand when the railing he was holding onto ripped off, making him scream as he fell to certain death, he couldn't even hear his voice as complete shock and panic filled every fibre of his body. This is it. This is the end.

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He tumbled down the mountain, shouting soundlessly with the pain that made him wish he died of the fall, and leaving no room for breath or thought.

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"It's alright, we're going to make it all better" A thickly accented voice spoke as the hot white agony kept his eyes squeezed shut, hearing metal on metal screeching and feeling a searing heat in his left shoulder, hearing that voice again. "It's alright, I'm a doctor, you're going to be just fine... Just fine."