Life after samcro

6

Now I know why I left charming because it's such a shit town. I got sent for groceries like 40 minutes ago and I don't want to get out this car. Im scared I'm gonna see someone I don't want to see, I also kinda can't be bothered. I eventually opened the car door and got out, fixing my jeans. I slammed the door, locked the car and made my way over to the main door. I always hated this grocery store. Every time I was in desperate need of something they were always out of it or they just hated me that much they lied. I grabbed a shopping cart and walked inside. Well who would have thought when I came back here id be grocery shopping, not me. I walked down the first aisle, filled with cereals and biscuits, not anything I'm looking for but may as well pick some stuff up for Junior while we are here. I scanned the shelves, while walking down the aisle, not really paying attention to where I was going. And of course I hit someone with my trolley.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I'm actually the clumsiest person ever" I said as I looked up and it was the one person I didn't want to see, not right now

"Mia" was all he said

I looked at him, scanned him up and down. He looked like shit, was he taking care of himself okay because it didn't look like it. His hair was a mess. His eyes were so dull and lifeless and he looks so drained. What the hell has happened to Jax Teller.

"You look like shit" I laughed, I'm nervous, I laugh, not even sorry

"Aw thanks. You look great. Like really great" Jax said as he ran his hand through his hair to make himself look a little better

"Thank you. How have you been?" I asked, which was probably a stupid question because right now he looks like he's been through hell

"Yeah, up and down. I see you've been doing good. Anyway congratulations on your book, knew you would do it" Jax smiled and I swear I saw his eyes light up for a few seconds but then the dullness came back over

"Yeah, thank you again. I know crazy how everything works out" and great, I've fucked that one up, while I'm doing amazing he looks like shit

"How's junior?" And I knew we had to be adults for the sake of it but when he asks this question I can't stand here and not be pissed

"Not to cause an argument but 5 years. 5 years Jackson! Where he fuck have you been. While junior needed his dad you didn't once dare to visit! He blames himself you know. He's been in counselling the past year" I said in a low voice so it wouldn't cause attention

"I'm sorry I am. I just couldn't bear to be so close to you yet so far" Jax said

"You could have met with him and Michael. You could have just said that and I would have gone away for the day or stayed late at the office. Don't dare use me as an excuse" I said through gritted teeth

"I know, all I can say is sorry because I truly am. I've just not been myself and I don't want it to fall onto Junior. I am sorry Mia" and I could see the hurt and pain in his eyes and I knew he was speaking the truth for the first time in 6 years

"Well we are staying with Chibs for a few days if you want to see Junior and Michael. I would appreciate it, if you did see them before we go back to New York as I know you won't visit them there" I said

"Okay, tonight or tomorrow? What day suits you best?" Jax asked

"Tonight but please try to make it look like you made an effort. You look like shit and you look like you haven't showered in a week. Comb your hair and wash your clothes Jax. I don't want junior to see you in a state and please for the love of God, do not come see your sons drugged up or I swear I will kill you myself" I said praying that he would take it all in

"You have my word. I promise I won't. I will see them tonight at 7 and I don't so drugs or drink anymore" Jax said

"Okay, I would like it if I'm there only because Junior will be unsure and I don't want him freaking out and then that means more counselling. We will have to be civil and act like good friends to set an example Jax, please we can't fuck it up" I pleaded

"You could never fuck anything up, only I'm good at that" Jax said and he smiled a little

"I'm not even going to disagree with that" I laughed

"Okay, see you all tonight. It was really good to see you Mia" Jax said as he walked closer

I didn't know if he was going in for the hug but I decided to anyway. He looked like he needed one. I wrapped my arms around his waist and he kinda back off a bit but then he wrapped his arms around me. It felt good, so good to be hugging him, it felt like home. If it's one thing I miss is Jax's hugs. I felt him tighten his grip and that's when I decided to pull away because I can't fuck with his head.

"Thank you" and with that he walked away leaving me standing in the aisle wishing that we, maybe, would still be together.

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Oh, so they have eventually saw each other. I know it wasn't much but it's a start