Protect Me (The Protective Archives, Book 1)

Kaksikymmentäyhdeksän/Twenty-nine - Asko

I felt Janne shift behind me, leaning his weight onto one hand. The longer I lay there waiting for him, the more nervous I became.

I'd never done anything like this before, and certainly not with another male. A million thoughts were racing around inside my head, none of them linking up together. All I could concentrate on was the soft pattern of his breathing, mixed amongst the sound of drawers being pulled open one-by-one.

I heard him rummage through the contents inside, the sound of a metal object colliding with the wood filling the entire space. He pushed the middle drawer shut after finding what he wanted, sitting on the bed beside me.

"This may be a little cold," he said, holding up a purple tube of transparent liquid for me to see. Noticing my bemused expression, he added: "It's lubricant. We're kind of going to need it, assuming you're still wanting to do the hanky panky with me."

"Why do we need it?" I asked, fearing the answer. I must have sounded ignorant to him, but he never once judged me on my lack of knowledge about sexual practices.

"Unless you want your first time to be living nightmare, you need to have some moisture up... There," he coughed awkwardly, clearing his throat. "Let's face it - you don't want to be bleeding and screaming the whole time, do you?"

I shuddered, briskly shaking my head from side-to-side. My attempt to shake the disturbing image from my mind proved futile, as it flashed up behind my eyes tauntingly. "No, thanks."

"That's exactly what I thought," he smirked, tapping me blithely on the nose with his middle finger. "You trust me, right?" Without giving me a chance to answer, he continued. "I know what I'm doing. I've done this a thousand times."

"That's totally reassuring," I mumbled under my breath, rolling over onto my back and staring up at the red felt ceiling.

Janne waved me off. "You know what I mean, Asko. Just relax for me."

Inhaling a deep breath and closing my eyes, I tried to push all thoughts of his dexterity aside. I knew he'd been with many people before, but that wasn't enough to make the flare of jealousy in me hurt any less. Deep down, I wanted to be the only person to share such an intimate experience with him.

My cogitation was interrupted when a pair of lips latched onto my neck. An involuntary moan left me, and I tilted my head to one side, revelling in the warm sensation of his mouth on my skin.

"You're so cute when you're frustrated," he chuckled into my ear, the pleasant sound vibrating through my body.

"I'm not frustrated," I defended myself, knowing he was right. "I was thinking."

"I saw that look on your face," he sniggered, pausing momentarily. His deep brown eyes met mine, glistening in the afternoon light filtering through the faded yellow curtains. "Your eyebrows scrunch together, and you narrow your lips so firmly together I think they might lose blood circulation and fall off your pretty little face."

I swatted him on the shoulder, scowling at him. He found humour in my response, a smirk curving up the side of his face. He looked extremely attractive in this moment - his long dyed black falling in luscious waves down his shoulders and back, highlighted gold in places from the natural light, and the way his flat upper lip parted from his full lower lip with each gentle breath he drew, his gaze focusing solely on me.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down to rejoin our lips. He placed one hand on the leather headboard above me, deepening the angle of our kisses. I gasped into his mouth, feeling his fingers trace the prominent outline between my thighs. Memories of the night he almost gave me oral flooded through my mind, and I couldn't help but flush.