twilight

{14} rope

{29th May 2016: 1:35am}

There is a rope that should be hanging round my neck, but it isn't. It is frayed and worn; as if I am not the only one it has tricked. There are knots and twists laced into the material, as if it is the only thing keeping it together, as if it is the only thing worth keeping together.

There is a rope; and I am taunted, and I am tortured, but I am not tempted.

There is a rope.

It follows me wherever I go; whenever I do something wrong, whenever I am someone I don't want to be.

I know that the rope does not want my neck, for it has many other admirers, but I think of it like it is trying to tell me something.

You don't want to end up like this. Like me. Like you. Like anyone. 

And what if I don't want to end up like this? What's so bad about that? Because, one moment everything seems perfect to me; to you, even. Surely that should be enough?

And then it all comes crashing down and then I fall and weep and cry and I can no longer sleep and I am tired and I have to stay awake and I have to keep on going and I have to do as they please and when they please and I have no other choice and I have no other choice.

I have a choice.

I have no other choice.

Don't you see? There will always be a rope; and I may not always want it to win. To let it take control, or tighten, or taunt.

I want that rope to leave; but then I change my mind.

And then I let it win.

Why did I let you win?

//VOTE//COMMENT//SMILE//