Louis POV
I was pretty pleased with how the party was going. My house was absolutely packed full of people, some of whom I’d never even seen in my life. People were drinking, dancing, laughing and talking, seemingly enjoying themselves. Everyone, but me. Sucks when you’re not even enjoying your own party. I was nervous as fuck. Tonight was the night I’d planned to tell Harry about how I felt, and I was shitting myself. Fuck, I needed a drink.
I made my way into the kitchen, dodging round flailing arms and overenthusiastic couples making out. Jesus, the kitchen was a mess. It was going to take years to clean all that shit up. I got myself a beer, and opened it, taking a huge glug. Hopefully, it would take the edge off a bit. How is it that I always manage to lose my friends at parties? I’d been with Amy not long ago, messing around with our music playlist on the computer. Now, she’d disappeared. Amanda was off with that Calum guy, and I’d put money on the fact that Niall was off with some girl. Liam had been sitting on the sofa chatting to a nice looking girl, and I wasn’t about to interrupt him, and i had no idea where Zayn was but then again who ever does. So, that left me. Alone. I suppose I could have been doing any of the things my friends were doing, but I just couldn’t relax tonight.
I turned round, leaning against the counter. The back door was open. I frowned, going over to see if anyone was outside. A slim blonde girl was sitting on the bench swing in our tiny garden. My face broke into a smile. With hair that light, it could only be Amy. I went over to her. “Ams, what’re you doing out here?” Judging by the smell, she was smoking a spliff, not that I could really see in the dark. “I wanted to be outside.” She said, her words slurred. She passed me the spliff. Her face was briefly illuminated as she relit the end of the joint. She was looking at me, a spaced-out expression on her face. I laughed. “Amy, why you looking at me like that?” “Do you never think, Lou, how weird it’d be if we didn’t know each other? Like, our lives would be so different…” she trailed off, in her own little world. “Your garden is so pretty. The flowers are all different colours. good job.” I snorted. Like she could see fuck all while it was this dark.
“Oh, you have to have some of this!” She said, rooting around in her top for something. I watched her with raised eyebrows, until she got out the little bag of acid. I shook my head. Normally, I’d drop acid with her no problem. But tonight, I needed to stay in control. “Nah . Can’t. I’m gonna try and tell Harry tonight…” She shoved the bag back inside her top, shrugging. “’Kay then. Scared?” I started to nod, then realized it was too dark to see. “Yeah. Shitting myself.” Amy laid her head in my lap, looking up at the sky, yet even in this light i could tell she was holding back a smirk. “It’ll be okay, Lou.” She said quietly. “How do you know that?” The way I saw it, I was either going to get turned down and then die of embarrassment, or it would actually be okay. My money was on the first one. “I just know.” She said wisely. “The stars are so pretty tonight. Do you never think, like, what it’d be like to touch a star?” I laughed, standing up and taking her hand. “C’mon you, let’s go back inside.”
Inside, Amy wanted to dance, and I couldn’t think of anything better to do. I’d gotten myself another beer, and I was feeling slightly better about the whole Harry thing. Amy was explaining to me about how she sometimes wondered if there was a point in life and what was life, typical tripper talk. She wasn’t making much sense, and her reasoning was pretty ridiculous. “Ams, wait here, I’m just gonna go get another drink. You want anything?” She shook her head.
When I came back from the kitchen, Amy had disappeared. Oh, so I was alone again. I really did not want to be alone; it gave me too much time to think. I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Alright, BooBear?” My heart leapt in my chest. Crap. “Hey, Haz. You alright?” he nodded. I couldn’t help noticing how green his eyes were. “Who the hell are all these people? I’ve never seen half of them…” he said, grinning easily at me. “I dunno, don’t even know how the hell they found out about the party.” We chatted for a while, but my mind was still on what I was going to say to him. I couldn’t wait any longer. “Harry… can I speak to you? Somewhere more… quiet?” Harry raised an eyebrow, smirking, but followed me into the kitchen and out the back door into the garden.
I shut the door behind us, then walked over to the bench. “What’s up?” He asked, putting both his hands behind his head and stretching out. “I don’t really know how to tell you this…” My palms were sweating and I felt sick. “But I um… I…” “Lou, just spit it out.” I took a deep breath, praying to a God I didn’t even know existed that I wouldn’t make a complete fool of myself. “I t-t-think I m-might be bisexual.” Harry sat up straight. In the half light, I could see his eyes practically staring holes in me. “You sure, Lou?” I sat back, running a hand through my messy curls. “No, I’m not fucking sure. I don’t even know what to think. God sake… this is such a mess…” I put my head in my hands.
“Louis?” Harry said softly. I turned my head towards him. He cupped my chin with his hand tilting my head upwards slightly. He moved closer to me, and then his lips were on mine. At first, it was weird, and a million and one thoughts were running through my head. But then… I enjoyed it. He was gentle, soft. His hand was warm, resting against my cheek. I let myself sink into the kiss, moving my lips in time with his. He slid his tongue over my lip gently, testing, asking if it was okay. I let my tongue meet his, exploring his mouth (yup so im awkward, but its larry, but, yeah .ok. no. k bye) He pulled back, and I could see his grin in the dark. “So you’re not sure, huh?” Harry’s grin widened as he took in my silence. He stood up suddenly. “Think about it.” He murmured, kissing me on the cheek and going back inside.
I was so confused, my head was practically spinning.
what did that mean?
Do i like him? Does he like me?
What the actual fuck?
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GOT SOME LARRY UP IN THERE!!!
yeah well that was awrks, anyway another chappie, be updating more on this story now, i would say a little less on innnocence but i only update that like once a month opps :L sorry
anyway a little calum, zayn and amanda soon ;)
comment, vote, follow ?? please, ill give you cookies
- Nicki xx
