Above The World (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

When we got back to school Monday I could barely look Aurora in the eye. She had no idea what I had said to Gabriel, but it was eating me up inside. I wondered if Gabriel would say anything. Barely knowing him did not give me much assurance that he would keep my words between us. I tried to put it out of my mind and act like nothing was bothering me.

In chemistry, Zenan and I worked on our experiment. We ended up doing a lot more talking than working though. Brooke had been begging me to invite Zenan to lunch with us one day so I took the opportunity. He agreed after mentioning that he wasn't on the best terms with his normal group of friends. We worked on the project until the bell rang.

"See you at lunch, Clay!" Zenan yelled to me as we parted ways in the hall.

At lunch, I met up with Aurora and Brooke, then we found Zenan. We took a seat at a table near the cafeteria door. Brooke stared at Zenan in awe half the time, while Zenan and Aurora talked to me about how I was liking Glencrest so far. I explained to them that I was actually starting to like Portland. I liked my house. I liked my neighborhood. I liked Glencrest. I liked my new friends. I liked my teachers. I couldn't complain. I didn't mention Gabriel to them. I assumed he wouldn't want people to know that I was tutoring him.

"So have you found a lucky guy yet?" Brooke asked.

I didn't say anything. Neither did anyone else at the table. Zenan looked confused. Aurora shot Brooke an awkward look. Brooke looked clueless.

"Um...no," I replied.

"What the hell, Brooke!" Aurora exclaimed.

"What?" Brooke asked, still looking clueless.

"It's fine," I assured them.

"Am I missing something?" Zenan asked.

"Um..." I hesitated, "I'm gay"

Zenan looked confused still. I said it as clearly as I figured I could. My eyes darted around the table, as if asking for help. No luck. Aurora and Brooke were awaiting Zenan's response just like I was. His face seemed to settle out of his confusion into better understanding.

"Cool." He said.

"That's all?" I asked.

"What do you want me to say? It's not an issue. My older brother is gay."

He smiled.

A wave of relief swept over me. There were officially three people at Glencrest that knew the real me and they were totally cool! I made sure to tell them to keep it between us though. No one else needed to know.

In calculus, Gabriel was actually on time. He took his seat next to me and handed me a calculus book.

"Hey Oakley, you left this at my place," he said.

"Thanks. What happened that night?"

"Nothing. No big deal."

I decided not to inquire anymore. I was still really confused, but I figured that he would never really tell me anything so I left it alone. Mrs. Cooper came around to pick up our homework. Gabriel handed his paper to her and she took it with a puzzled look. She looked over it and smiled at Gabriel.

"Did you do this by yourself, Mr. Covarrubias?" She asked.

"Yeah! Are you proud of me?" Gabriel asked with a proud grin.

"If this is all your work, then yes. This is a road I like to see you going down. Good job!"

Gabriel continued grinning. He looked over at me and offered me a high five. I put my hand in the air and let him slap it. It was the first time we made any physical contact. It sent a shiver through my body. I was such a loser! Getting excited from a high five.

"Thanks man! Are you gonna help me more?" Gabriel asked.

"Of course. If you feel like you need it."

"Definitely, man. Is tonight okay?"

"Sure!" I said excitedly, without any hesitation. I felt lame for seeming so eager.

Our study sessions became a daily routine. Every night after Gabriel came from football practice, I would go over to his house. We would listen to music from his computer while we studied. Sometimes we talked, never about serious stuff though, just music and school and girls. I told him that Aurora and I had decided to just be friends and stop fooling around, so I wouldn't have to make up any more dirty stories about the two of us. I always left Gabriel's place before his dad got home. I never questioned it again, I just accepted it as part of the routine and went on my way.

One night I was laying in bed on the phone with Lauren when I looked outside my window and noticed Gabriel sitting on the large tree between our houses. The same tree I had climbed down to avoid his dad. I wondered why he was sitting out there. I had never seen him out there before. I told Lauren I would call her back and hung up the phone. I opened my window and felt a rush of wind hit my face.

"Gabriel?"

He didn't respond. He just stared out into the night sky with his hands laying in his lap.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

Still no answer. I started to go back inside and leave him to his sitting, but I was too concerned to just turn away now. I climbed out of my bedroom window and onto the tree. I carefully crawled across and took a seat next to Gabriel on a branch. I didn't say anything. What could I say? I didn't even know why he was out there.

"I come out here to think sometimes," he finally said.

"What do you think about?" I asked.

"Everything. School. Football. Family..." His voice trailed off.

"It's nice out here," I said.

"Yep," he agreed.

I didn't say anything else until Gabriel spoke again.

"Hey I can talk to you, right?"

"Sure," I assured him.

"I'm alone man," he said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I don't have anyone that I feel close to. I feel like I'm all by myself."

"You are Gabriel Covarrubias. The star quaterback. Everyone either knows you, or wants to know you. How can you feel alone?"

"That's the point. All those people are fake. They don't like me for me. They like me for what I can do for them or what parties I can get them into. You're the first person that hasn't come at me that way, believe it or not."

"Well you have your family, right?"

"What family? My mom is gone, I'm an only child, and my dad is a mess."

"A mess?"

"You wanna know the reason you've never met him...I'm embarrased! He's a fucking drunk! Ever since my mom died, he's been drinking away the pain. He gets off of work and goes to the bar to get liquored up. It happens more often then not. I hate it, but whenever I bring it up, he acts like it doesn't exist. Football is the only thing that keeps him sane. That's why it's so crucial to me. Talking about football is the only time we have an actual conversation."

The words continued to roll off of Gabriel's tongue. He never looked at me the whole time. He continued to gaze into the night, almost as if not really talking to me, more to himself, confessing everything that he hadn't yet come to terms with.

"I'm sorry," he said, finally looking at me.

"For what?" I asked.

"For dropping all of this on you out of nowhere. You don't even know me like that. You probably think differently of me now."

"I do, but that's not a bad thing," I assured him.

"You probably think I'm really lame now, huh?"

I told him that it was just the opposite. I thought more highly of him being able to share his thoughts and feelings.

"I'm gonna try to get some sleep," said Gabriel. He got up and crawled into his bedroom window. "Thanks," he said as he closed the window, and then shut the curtains. I sat in the tree for a little while longer, processing all what Gabriel had shared with me that night and taking in the crisp night air.