Speechless

chapter four •the loneliness•

•••

The next couple days went by rather quickly. I gained more friends, and by that I mean I was introduced to more people by Liam and Ronan. I didn't really communicate with anyone I had met however.

I think any other girls or just people would be lonely. Not having many friends. Being the new weird kid who doesn't talk. No one really in your corner. It seems like such a sad life.

Obviously I wasn't going to have many friends since friendship is related to communication, and let's face it, I was not the best at that. So I became used to it. I welcomed it even. The loneliness became my friend. I felt perfectly content being alone in my room with just my sketchbooks and music. There was nothing else I really needed...Or so I told myself.

I didn't need friends that took pity on me like in middle school. I didn't need friends who talked about me behind my back like in my old high school. I certainly didn't need superficial friends who would just use me in this new school. And of course, somehow I had already made several if those.

This particular girl named Brittany, who happened to be the same girl I bumped into that first day and broke her overly expensive phone case, was the worst of these so called friends. I think she completely forgot that I was the one to ruin her phone case because she was being so sweet to me. My guess is that she wanted to use me to climb up the social ladder into the cool kid group. What made the situation even worse is that I didn't even want to be in that group. They acted so superior and I hated it.

However, trying to get out of it was quite hard when you have the two ring leaders in you're homeroom, one of which also has almost every class with you. Not to mention the fact that Ronan was very persistent in his attempts to break me.

"10! Yes! I'm halfway there,Daisy. This is even easier than I thought it would be." Ronan exclaimed at lunch after I told him how to do a calculus problem he was having trouble with.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head at him which was the usual response to anything that came out of Ronan's mouth.

In my peripheral vision I could see Kyle sitting a couple tables away from us in the caf. He was laughing with his friends about something. He looked happy, unlike me who was dying from all the ridiculous questions Ronan would throw at me just to get a long answer.

Kyle was probably my closest thing to a friend here. He says hi sometimes when we pass in the hall and I give him a slight smile. It's mostly in photography class that we talk, or rather he talks and I nod my head. But I enjoy it more than any other part of the school day.

He caught me staring at him in the corner of his eyes. Naturally, I blushed and looked back my food only to look up again and see him still looking at me. Kyle grinned and I smiled back.

Just then Liam came to the lunch table and sat right in front of me, blocking my Kyle from my view. Instantly I stopped smiling and Liam noticed. He looked back to where Kyle talking to his friends and looks at me.

"Did I interrupt something there?" He asked guiltily, rubbing the back of his head.

I shook my head but Ronan interjected, "Just little Daisy here having some eye sex with our friend Kyle. Thank god you came though. It was getting downright uncomfortable. Here I am, asking her questions, just trying to get to know her, and she's just having some intimate eyes sex with some other guy. It's insulting!" He ranted on about how most girls want to jump his bones while I pay zero attention to him.

"Fine whatever, I'm over it." Ronan declared. "Just remember we have an English project to do together Friday so there's no ignoring me then."

I rolled my eyes at his smugness. Of course out of the other 20 people in our English class, I ended up being paired with Ronan for a project. Just my luck.