My Own Little Thoughts

5/30/16

  Hi guys, well life has gone downhill from the last chapter. One of my friends stopped talking to me, and the other one is dating her ex now. And I just snapped at that point. I just told her how stupid that idea was and how broken she told me she was once he broke up with her and then she just crawls back to his dumbass. I just stormed off in front of her and walked home. After that I felt horrible and didn't want to go back to school. I have to go back to school tomorrow and I already feel like shit. I don't feel like shit because of my attitude but because I constantly feel like shit. I'm always walked over by people. Also I'm just always alone, I don't have a shoulder to lean on and I don't have someone to say I love you to. I feel so alone and lost. I just want to feel loved again by someone to actually cares. But the problem is that no one cares. I've tried so many things but none of them work. I actually starved myself in the beginning of the year because I hated my body and I still do. No one cares and most people probably won't care even if they read this. Some day I'm going to say goodbye to everyone and just ditch this place. I just want to get away from everyone for a day or two and not give a fuck about the world. I wish I could really do that but I probably won't be able to. I remember that this one guy used to like me, but I just realized that he probably never did. That broke me so bad because he was so nice and everything just corrupted. My friends don't even like me. And now I have to be surrounded by lovey Dovey shit for another five months or something so I might as well die instead of people rubbing their love life in my fucking face. Good night people love u all bye 💖✨.