Saving Grace (on hiatus)

Ch 18: Bwa.Ha.Ha

Gracie POV:

"have you ever noticed how squirrel sex is kind of violent? We should stop saying 'fuck like rabbits' and instead fuck like those squirrels right there."

I kept focusing on my breathing, resting my head between my knees. "Leviathan...shut up."

"its funny you think I'm going to listen."

I glared at him from the corner of my eye, "that girl is dead because of us!"

He shot me a blank look, "Yay. Go team." Rolling his eyes he ran his tongue over his pointed teeth. "Bitch please i rule over the underworld whats one human slut to me. Humans are stupid little fucks anyways."

It was hard to believe he was ever an angel, that he was anything more than this horrible man.

"You. Are. The. Worst."

"I. Am. The. Devil."

"But you weren't always! You were an angel once."

He went still for a moment before forcing himself back into his relaxed position. "Im still a fucking angel, im just a fallen one. Duh."

"Were you always this horrible?!"

"Uh yeah."

"I don't believe you."

He sneered at me, "and i suppose you still believe in fairy tales? Or even more ludicrous that you mortals actually know what it means to live?"

I blinked at him, "did you just use a word like ludicrous?"

His brow twitched a bit, but he just stared at me, "im constantly trying to kill you and your keeping track of my vocab? Do you count  how many times a day i say cock too? The answer is 666 b.t.w be happy you figured out the secret of the three numbers."  

My head was starting to hurt.

"buut hey baby now that you committed suicide your stuck with me no matter what! bwa.ha.ha."

"....i can still be absolved of my sins you know."

"suicide is a sin no one comes back for and fyi your priest is a liar if he says kissing the bar slut when your wife isn't looking is an equal sin to shooting your wife in the face six times."

"no one comes back from it because they don't come back to life. therefor, they can't redeem themselves."

He paused for a long moment.

Then his brow started to twitch again.

one....

two..........

three..............

"OH MOTHER FUCKER! FUCK YOU DAD, FUCK YOU! ALWAYS RUINING MY FUCKING FUN OF FUCKERY!" He shot up from the ground and began to pace, "I MEAN WHATS ONE LITTLE BITTY BITCH WITH A FAT ASS TO YOU?! NOT LIKE YOUR GONNA FUCK IT. YOU. CANT. FUCK. IS THAT WHY YOUR PISSED AT ME?! BECAUSE I HAVE A FABULOUS DICK?! I FUCKING HATE THAT YOU ALWAYS TRY TO TAKE AWAY MY TOYS!" he spun to face me, "AND YOU! JUST FUCKING CHOKE ON A DICK AND DIE ALREADY! YOU ARE GETTING BORING AS FUCK DO SOMETHING INTERESTING CANDY ASS!"

I blinked at him, "uh. no?"

He hissed at me through his teeth, "worst hooker EVER!"

"considering im not a hooker can I take that as a compliment?"

"shut the fuck up before i spank you ass so hard...oh wait your secret whore mind would like that."

Well then. 

"and stop dressing like an old cat lady! its a turn off!"

"....I do not dress like-"

"no wonder people drop dead around you with the horror you put them through with your so called style...wait hold up."

oh no..

A grin spread over his face, "lets go to the mall! maybe someone will get shot in the face."

"uhm..cant I just go home."

He mimicked me childishly before sneering, "no. and dad doesn't love everyone equally."

"...where did that come from?"

"if he did there wouldn't be ugly people, you would have boobs, and he would never of had a favorite son." he sat back on the ground with a huff, "stupid fucker."

...is he sulking? I tried not to let the giggle escape as he sat there glaring at nothing, part of his hair falling into his eyes as he chewed on his lip ring.

But I did.

And those icy eyes flickered to me the second the sound escaped my lips, "the fuck you giggling over, you still have no boobs. thats no laughing matter."

I bit my lip to keep from laughing. "I'm not giggling."

"whatever."

another laugh escaped, "you're kind of cute when you sulk though, fyi. sort of like a puppy."

He sneered at me, "just for that I'm killing you with a pack of wild dogs next."

that shut me up fast.