The Ghost Heiress (On Hold)

Chapter 5. Sang without a Song

Sang's POV:

I and Wil left the garden after one last hug. He took me to the servant's quarters which were localized at the back of the house.

I had a room all for myself, courtesy of Wil, and it was actually quite beautiful, with a cherry blossom's wallpaper and bamboo' furniture, pillows strew over the bed and a wardrobe full of new, more high quality, kimonos.

It was obvious the place had been recently updated and I was overwhelmed by my friend's kindness.

I thanked Wil profusely which left the boy with what looked like a permanent blush on his face.

Once I had taken off my kimono and donned my yukata I went to lie down in the softest bed I had ever laid in before.

For the first time in a long time I managed to have a peaceful night of sleep.

......

The next morning I woke up with the light of the sun rays and prepared myself to serve my mistress.

Dressed in the kimono of a servant I walked with purposeful steps to where I knew would be Marie-sama's rooms.

I did not bother with knocking for I knew she would be still asleep.

Walking with the utmost silence, born from years of practice, I started to fix the complete chaos that she'd managed to create in her room in the space of a few hours.

Putting the last piece of cloth back in place on her wardrobe I went ahead and selected a new kimono for her to wear that morning.

It was a baby blue piece with delicate white flowers embroidered on it. It looked pure, simple and sweet. Everything that Marie-sama wasn't.

But who was I to judge? I was no more than an orphan who had been abandoned by her own parents, unwanted, and forced to serve the Sorensons.

Which meant that I was a nobody.

I felt the old shame sneak up my spine and repressed it. There was no time for self-pity. I had a job to do.

Finished with tidying the room I slipped out of it and headed to the kitchen to talk with the cook about what my mistress's expectations of her breakfast.

The older woman seemed startled when I entered the kitchen and I noticed, belatedly, that I had still been walking silently, keeping my presence hidden.

After the poor woman calmed from the scare I gave her we spoke for a few minutes and came to an agreement on what would be served for breakfast.

Seeing that it was almost time for Marie to wake up I walked back to her room and entered just as she was rising from her bed.

"You are late!" She grumbled; her voice rough from sleep, her hair matted to her face.

I wasn't, and she knew it too. Unless she thought her room had magically fixed itself overnight, but I didn't complain about her lies, choosing to remain silent.

I helped her dress, all the while listening to her abusive words and venom.

I tried to block her voice, but it had such a grating timbre that it was impossible to completely ignore.

"Useless, good-for-nothing, ugly, stupid, whore, unwanted..." these were some of the words I heard every single day directed at me.

Some people would tell me to stop whining, that they were only words.

But sometimes, words hurt more than blows.

I knew it for a fact, I had received my share of blows from Marie-sama's mother, and I preferred them to these abusive words that destroyed me from the inside out.

What felt like years later, but must've been only a few minutes, she left to go to breakfast, leaving me alone in her room.

I took a deep breath, trying to recover some of my sense of dignity before stepping out and heading back to my rooms. I already felt exhausted and the day had only begun.

But Marie wouldn't need me for the rest of the day, which meant I had a few hours of freedom to myself.

Walking into my room I headed to the wardrobe and retrieved one of the gifts Wil had given me along with the beautiful room and clothes.

It was, actually, the most important gift.

I had received a violin, something that had been taken from me by Marie-sama's mother. Something that I had loved and missed dearly.

My music was the only safe outlet for the dark emotions that I carried in my heart and I had really needed the violin, but even this need had been denied to me by my masters.

It had been their most foolish decision.

Some of the lessons that I'd received and Marie didn't were in martial arts and herbal medicine which included the producing of poisons.

Knowing I had the power and means to kill the people who hurt me every day was a dangerous temptation. The only thing stopping me was the safety of my clan. We needed a clan head and an heir to keep the other clans at bay, otherwise there would be a war.

Removing the violin from its wood box I walked over to the window in my room and sat sideways in the windowsill. Propping the violin under my chin I raised the arm and started to play.

I didn't bother with playing someone else's song and instead let my arm and fingers move with freedom, releasing the music from my soul, my violin singing the notes I could never sing myself for lack of a voice.

Another thing they had taken from me. My ability to sing.

I almost snorted at the irony of it all. I was Sang, the girl who couldn't sing a song.

I sighed instead and kept playing, putting all my sorrow, grief, fears and yes, all my rage into my music.

Because I was only human, and no matter how much I tried to stop myself from such ugly feelings I couldn't help but hate the Sorensons.

I hated them with every cell in my body and these feelings made me feel guilty.

Isn't hate an ugly emotion that I shouldn't have?

I didn't know, and I had no one to ask, so I played.