Please Don't Let Me Go

Chapter 2~ This Is The Future

The tension in the room was absolutely astounding.

I couldn't believe that among the one-hundred and seventeen employees in total that were at risk of being let off the job, I happened to be one of the few to be chosen.

It was such a sudden wake-up call hearing my name, followed by the words: "I'm sorry Young, due to your lack of experience in comparison to your colleagues, and the descending market of Coca-Cola, Owatonna, we can no longer have you an employee"

This hit me like a freight train. It took enough courage to actually ask for the job in the first place, now I was losing it all together.

The odds of being chosen were low, but all too often we rely on low odds and because of these, expect a positive outcome, simply because the positive probability will outweigh the less-favorable.

Today I was handed my last ever pay slip I'd be recieving for a long time.

Meaning I've taken two steps back instead of one step forward.

Another disappoint to add to my list of disappointments in life. Why do I have to be such a failure?!

I'm my parent's only child for goodness sake!

The least I could have done for them was grow up to be the man they probably wished I could have become. That's if I had of tried harder.

Everyone just expects their son or daughter to become some excellent genius, grow up to become something or someone amazing, out of the ordinary. (In a good way of course)

If you ask me, that's a lot of pressure for one to carry on his shoulders.

Sadly, that boy was not me.

Sometimes I wish I had a brother or sister, that way at least they'd have someone to admire for their success while their pathetic excuse of a son came home with blisters on his palms from lifting boxes all day at a warehouse.

I suppose I wasn't bad going for an extremely shy guy, living in the middle of nowhere.

I have a job, (well, HAD a job) I know how to cook (sort of) which means I could probably sustain myself, and I have goals in life, just like every other person does.

And a lot at that.

The trouble is, mine are so far out of reach...

Good things are hard to get, and good people are hard to find.

I have virtually nothing apposing the two.

Except for music; I've been 'experimenting' lately, with various audio programs on my laptop.

It's the way I relax and release stress, and also quite a leisurely hobby. I can remix songs, adjusting gain, pitch and tone to some of my favorite tracks.

I may even start recording my own someday.

But I can't expect this to help my income.

That's the future, and right now, I need to focus on and organize my present life.

Maybe I'll physically note my goals and ambitions rather than locking them away in my head, which most likely has no vacancy for excess thoughts.

Besides, self-motivation and determination are the key to success.

I'll be writing these down as soon as I arrive home? Yes. I will.

No more procrastination, Adam.

The drive home was quiet, with nothing but the company of my steady breaths, fogging up the windows, even though it was only August.

The sky was generously covered in dreary rain clouds, not a sliver of blue or ray of autumn sunshine to be seen. This made me feel as though the atmosphere was coincidentally mimicking my thoughts and situation right now.