Melanie Martinez// Album: Crybaby

Part 4// Carousel

  Father's gone, I don't know why. It's really strange my mother gets all squeamish when I try to ask. So she told me to get out of the house, she offered up the local carnival downtown. So I wore a whimsical outfit and rushed out the door.

  When I finally got there I was overwhelmed, not having a normal childhood, I never went to carnivals with my family. The smell of funnel cake, hot dogs and popcorn filled my senses with the many calories. Just when I was walking towards a bumper car booth I spotted him. It looked to be the same boy I spotted on the playground, the day of my elementary breakdown.

  I'm already broken, so why not take a risk? I walked up nervously to him,
"Hey uh- Jarediwaswonderingifyouwanttogoonsomeoftherideswithme."
"Sure, sounds like fun."
   So we went to the mirror house, the carousel, the roller coasters, and I saved the ferris wheel for last. We climbed on the swaying cubicle. I grabbed his arm to steady my balance, and felt my face grow hot. The ride was slow and anticipated, I glanced at Jared a few times, I don't want him to think I'm boring.

  We reached the top, all of a sudden he grabs my shoulders and turns me to face him. Jared then pulls me forward and we share a passionate, slow kiss. I pull away, looking stunned. I assume it'll be okay, and lay my head on his shoulder for the rest of the ride. When we get to the bottom I loop my arm around his, but he pulls away, walking sternly with a cloudy face. I glance at his phone, the title labeled "Babe".

  The storm clouds have gathered and it begins to drizzle, I give him a bear hug, wanting home to protect me from the rain. Jared looks at me disgusted, and pushes me away. It begins to pour, I fall into a puddle and my skirt is stained, my hair matted and my makeup ruined. I yell to him, but he just keeps on walking, like nothing happened without looking back once. The rain mixes with my sobbing and tears, no one notices. I knew no one could love me. Not even Jared.