Success

Sticks and stones

As a 12 year old kid, anything I said was nothing but childish hopes, no matter how ambitious I was, I was only a daydreamer.
Everyone in my entourage brought me down, everyone. They made fun of me, once my dad told me that in such a country, dreams like that never come true, son you are building your life on an unreal dream, son wake up!
Words like these, made me forget about that dream. Years passed and I became even more desperate, what am I going to do now? Who am I? Ever since I was 7 I knew what I wanted to do, whh I wanted to be, but now I'm lost, I cant focus. I cant put my mind on something, one day I want to be a singer, one day I want to be a writer, there were nights I wanted to be a dancer, a doctor, an engineer, an actor... anything, I wanted to do anything that might provide me the same pleasure car manufacturing would bring. Nothing seemed to work, I couldnt sing, act, couldnt stand blood.
Fast forward to my senior year in high school, 17 year old, living a meaningless life, hundreds of car pictures on my phone,dreaming time to time of making my own, but those dreams were soon to fade. One day, my dad came to me, he told me that he had managed to get me a seat in a contest for an automotive engineering university, those news felt like Beyoncé just kissed me and asked to have my babies. The bad news though, were that the contest is one week away, Im far away from prepared, but I knew that it was a chance given to me by god, so I had to take it.
At that time I had a girl, she was sweet, I'm talking about her because what she did for me was something I think I can never repay, her support was amazing, it kept me going thrue the nights, she stayed up late with me looking up exercises and tests with the correction... I knew I had to succeed, if not for me, for her, and for my parents who even though didnt believe in me, once they saw a chance for me to get close to my dream, they had no second thoughts about telling me...
The week came to an end, I went to the university to pass the test, I worked so hard I didnt have the right to say its hard anymore. Now I had to wait for the results, one week, two weeks, three weeks passed.. no answer, I started giving up, but on a friday night, it was me and my father in the house,I was scrolling down my Gmail, trying to see if theres anything new... a new message! Its from the university!! Belive me when I say, for five minutes I kept looking at the screen with tears on my eyes, not only did I succeed, I was within the people who aced and who were able to pass without needing an interview... I never seen my dad so proud of me until that day, my girl started crying while hugging me, telling me she knew I could do it.
But, nothing good seemed to last, even though I was within the first, even though they offered me 50% off the study fees or whatever they're called, that university was too expensive for us, I had to turn it down as soon as I knew about the cost. Once again, i had to go through the same path of dispair, I couldnt stop the tears, my dream is once again out of my reach just because Im poor?
I cant let it go that way...